clarity in creation.

trading spaces!

2011-02-24T20:18:00.000-05:00

hey friends! good news... all you lovelies who put a bug in my ear to start blogging again, surprise! i've moved! http://faithfromfibro.wordpress.com/

love you all :)
-r

HIIIIIIIII EVERYBODY!!!

2011-02-07T07:40:00.000-05:00

hey y'all! oh my goodness, it's been a long time.

first off, how the heck are ya?!? you could have moved across the country and i would have missed it since i've been gone! what's everyone up to? school? work?

goodness gracious, a lot of things have changed in my life as well, and i thought i'd swing by to update you guys. i've gotten some INCREDIBLY sweet comments and emails from my blog friends saying hi and checking on me, and can i just say how much that means to me? you guys rock my world.

so, where do i begin?

- i finished last semester with straight A's! i think that might have been the first time ever in the history of education. it was doubly a huge blessing because it was my first semester back and i was scared out of my mind!

- i started taking classes again this semester, but with everything going on health-wise, right now just wasn't the right time, so i withdrew. again. yesss.... i wasn't very happy about this, and i still am not. it breaks my heart to not be able to move forward, but you know, God is good. He's shown me a million reasons why withdrawing was the right choice. it still kinda stings, though, but i know this isn't the end of the road for me :)

- i have a job interview this morning! i am TERRIFIED to come back to work, since it's been over a year since i had to quit my job before. i am just applying for a front desk position at my local gym, nothing big, but for me? it's HUGE. i am so looking forward to being able to love on people first thing in the mornings. i might be the first face they see everyday, and what better opportunity to show love than that? AND bring in a paycheck?!? i'm psyched (as is my dwindling savings account!).

- i had to put running on hold right now. just not working out so well with the body, but i have still been able to be active! i'm realizing it doesn't matter whether or not what i do is considered a "workout," that just being active is the key to a healthy body. whether that's a walk or a 100 mile run, who cares? take care of yourself, and let the details rest.

- i decided to grow my hair back out! who knows how long it will end up, but i decided i really miss the soft femininity of longer hair. when i'm really fibro-y, it would be nice to have something soft and beautiful to kinda "distract" from the bleariness of my eyes, ya know? we shall see.

- as far as pain/fibro goes, honestly, it's been awful. it's been a struggle every day, and it's taken a lot bigger toll emotionally than i expected. i'm not sure why it shocks me to still be struggling to grasp this a year later, but it is and it does, daily. but God is so good - there isn't a day that goes by where i don't realize how much this has shaped my life, for the better. God continues to bless me through it and by it, and that blows me away. don't get me wrong, it still brings me to tears almost every day, but when you see the purpose in something, it makes it all worthwhile, doesn't it?

- i've been cooking dinner most nights here! it's been an awesome journey in the kitchen. i'm getting more and more comfortable, and learning tons of new skills/techniques, thank goodness! i have been doing a lot of soups, but also some more "structured" foods for our meals. i did get my celiac test again, and i am sticking to gluten-free from here on out. can i just say, I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER! seriously. if you struggle with bloating, i HIGHLY recommend seriously committing to a trial run of going gluten-free. it might be pointless, but if it could possibly help at all, don't you deserve that?

- as far as eating by a label, i will just say i am not currently able to eat vegan. my weight was suffering to the point of being dangerous, and i am still working with what is the best food for treating my body right. am i an omnivore/pescatarian/whatever? honestly, i don't really care, nor do i feel the need to "define" myself. i will keep you posted on how it goes!

now your turn! what's going on!?!?

i miss y'all! and product review.

2010-11-10T10:42:00.000-05:00

hey friends!!! i hope you all are having a wonderful wednesday morning. i slept until almost 7am, and am home alone enjoying the quiet right now :) what have you been up to? and i can't thank you enough for leaving those wonderful comments on my last post. you seriously made me feel incredibly loved, and it's incredible to know i matter to so many amazing people i've never even "met!"

a quick update? the fibro is pretty poopy, but God never stops doing amazing things to prove to me that life ISN'T about how i feel. it's about so much more than that! i'm realizing that this illness is the biggest gift He could have given me, because it made me WAKE the heck up and start praising Him for the incredible things He's doing in my life, and in the the lives of those around me. i've had the incredible opportunity to get to know some amazing girls in my life, and i am realizing now just how blessed I am.

school is going ok, and i can't believe i'm about to finish my first semester back in school! what a gift. life is going well at home, and i have been able to spend a fair amount of time with my mom which is wonderful. i'm helping her cook thanksgiving dinner this year, so keep me in your prayers!!! i've just been enjoying each new day, even though there have been many that were hard and i wanted to give up. if i can encourage you guys at all - never give up! EVER! you have no idea what the very next day will bring... and life is usually best understood when you can step back and look at it with new eyes. they say hindsight is 20-20, right?

just a quick shoutout of thanks to CSN for a wonderful product to review. i was blown away to be able to order 3 2-quart containers from Frieling. i really needed something to freeze soups in for my mom, and CSN graciously came through! i love these containers (yeah, i do. got a problem with that?), and they work perfectly in the fridge or freezer. and ps - if you need soup recipies, email me! i serioulsy have a quite the collection building here.

in other news, i've joined the dark side. no seriously, i'm a brunette now! i've been toying with the idea to dye my hair for a loooong time, but wanted to wait until the weather cooled down some (doesn't dark hair seem like winter?). and thanks to the evil influence of this girl, i made the jump! here are a few quick photos i snapped for y'all this morning... up close and personal, no?

aaaaanddddd enough of my face. i haven't been reading blogs recently due to school and meeting so many new people at my new church, but i seriously love you and all am praying for each and every one of you. fill me in if i've missed anything big or small, they all are important to me!

love y'all! hope to be back soon :)

-rebekah

HI!

2010-11-04T05:15:00.000-04:00

hey beautiful (and handsome!) friends -

how are you all!? i miss hearing about your days and what you've been up to. just had to pass on something i found worth mentioning.

if you have a second, would you read this article about body image and disability? it makes you think and might just open up a whole new world to you, one where those with disabilities aren't scary or weird, but beautiful.

thoughts/reactions? any news i need to hear?! i love y'all!
-r

p.s. - i will be back with a product review soon, and hopefully a little update post soon!

thanks are due.

2010-10-16T22:33:00.001-04:00

Hey guys! How is everyone!??! I seriously miss y’all like crazy. I haven’t really been able to read many blogs or comment nearly as much as you deserve, but such is life, right? What’s been kickin’ in your neck of the woods the last few weeks?

Unfortunately I’ve still been struggling with getting to school and the pain is fairly poopy at best, but you know what? Praise god for doing amazing things regardless! I seriously have never been more in awe and more grateful for life. If you take nothing else away from this blog, please know your Creator loves you so, so much! It changes your life, y’all.

As much as I wish I could say I’m back, I’m just stopping in to thank a few companies who have been more than generous to me during my little break:

First of all, shout-out to CSN for hookin’ y’all up with an awesome giveaway – how sweet of them, right? As if that wasn’t generous enough, they’ve asked me to do a product review, coming soon! CSN is an awesome collection of websites that has everything from drop leaf tables to kitchen appliances, and I have no idea what to review! I’m thinking a vegetable spiralizer...? yes?

Also, artisana sent me an amazing package packed full of their new raw nut butters, seriously way too kind! please check them out! What an amazing company that runs their business just how i would. They have new flavors out that make me swoon – macadamia nut butter, cashini (cashews and tahini), chocolate coconut butter?!?! Trust me, you won’t regret it grabbing some, and your sammies will thank you.

And today I got the cutest package from larabar! I won their cocoa mole retirement giveaway, and not only did they send a few bars (my mom’s excited about them!), but they also sent the CUTEST t-shirt! I’ll post a picture soon!

Thank you to these incredibly sweet companies, and thank you guys for being such amazing friends!

-rebekah

worst post ever.

2010-10-10T06:28:00.000-04:00

hey friends! i hope everyone is having a rockin' weekend. i got treated to lunch at the Whole Foods hot bar yesterday! definitely a highlight of my week.

so i'm finally sitting down to write something i've been avoiding for quite some time... and i don't like it one bit. as i've been alluding for the last month or so, my fibro is moving into a rather poopy place right now, and i've been struggling to accept that. i sleep most of the day, am having a hard time getting to classes, and just have no energy for anything. i'm not trying to whine - i'm really ok with it! it's frustrating, yes, but i'm learning to honor my body for what it is and praise God no matter what is happening physically.

not sure why, but i didn't take into account how draining the process of going back to school would be. in my mind, i think i'm still in denial about how limited i am - i'm 21 years old, for goodness sakes! but i forget that doesn't make me invincible :)

i also have had to own up to the fact that i'm completely wiped out emotionally. each day is an enormous spiritual and physical battle, and i'm struggling to handle it. i cry a lot, i wimp out daily, and i often forget how incredibly blessed i am. i'm realizing i need to allow myself to heal and just learn the lessons God is graciously teaching me - a skill i've never allowed myself to master in the past.

while i'm in this place, though, i don't have a lot to give to you guys... there's just nothing left! and you all deserve the absolute best and 100% of my attention. i won't settle with crappy posts and surface-y, feel-good discussions that don't challenge or encourage either of us!

the funny thing is, now that i'm sleeping all day instead of only 2 or 3 hours, i don't have the time to accomplish everything i want to... and one of those things is blogging. it absolutely breaks my heart because the connection i have with you all is one of the biggest blessings in my life. i seriously can't tell you how much you all mean to me! but right now, i have to get school done and help take care of my family first.

so please know, my heart is with you guys each and every second of the day. you all are constantly in my prayers and thoughts. i seriously wouldn't be who i am without your influence, guidance, and ceaseless encouragement, and i am incredibly thankful for that! i'm not sure how long i'll need to step away from blogging, but know that i absolutely love emailing you guys, and would be thrilled to hear from you - nelsonrr (at) mymail (dot) vcu (dot) edu. and i will try to stop by your blogs when i get the time, but know you guys are constantly on my heart. love y'all!

please keep in touch!
- rebekah

can i say something?

2010-10-06T14:46:00.001-04:00

i haven't been exactly too sure how to approach all the drama recently, and honestly? i don't really care about it.

source.

i think everyone is so caught up in "whose side" they're on that they're missing the point. anytime the poop hits the fan, we should try to step back, chill the heck out, and see the nugget of truth in the situation.

so i don't really care how you feel about the article, truthfully, but i do care about you. instead, i'm asking you to really dig deep and consider these questions:

how's your relationship with food? how do you feel about the way you eat and your body? how do others react to your habits?

-rebekah

this made my day.

2010-10-05T20:26:00.000-04:00

1 large avocado + 1/3 cup cocoa + 8 soaked dates + pinch salt + shredded coconut for sprinkling = chocolate avocado mousse from heaven.

p.s. - i'm an auntie again! Tanner Leigh, 8lbs 8oz, born at 5:14pm!

p.s.

2010-10-04T15:36:00.000-04:00

hi again! forgot to include this last link.

um, i'm not gonna say i told you so... but please read this. oh snap!

sounds familiar? catch my thoughts - part one, two, and three.

what are your thoughts?
- rebekah

gahh i'm drowning.

2010-10-04T15:13:00.000-04:00

hey there beautiful people. today i'm swimming in homework, cooking for the family, and fighting off a cold, so no deep blogging thoughts for this noggin'.

instead of my post keeping you entertained, may i give you some suggestions?

- head to your library and check out, or if you aren't a dirt-poor college student, buy, the moosewood restaurant cooking for health cookbook. i finally brought this little treasure home after taking a hint from a very reliable source... check it out! you won't regret it, and you gotta make the southwestern black bean burgers - THEY HOLD TOGETHER!!!

- please read one size doesn't fit all by stacy at the habit of healthy. it's one of the most amazing posts i've ever read, and should be mandatory for EVERY female to read. leave her some comment love while you're at it... this girl is dynamite, y'all.

- the weather this time of year is MADE for long walks. skip the gym (really gotta twist your arm, right?), grab your camera, and hit up your neighborhood or a trail or park near you. listen to your momma and go get some fresh air!

love you guys! how's the weather near you? it's in the 60's here!
-r

my thoughts: make-up.

2010-10-02T07:51:00.000-04:00

hey all. happy weekend! and thank you so much for your awesome thoughts on make-up!

some comments that really stood out to me:

Dana's honesty about the fact that we DO get treated differently all dolled up, but true confidence comes from within. amen sister!

Ayla totally owning that she IS pretty without it, and wishes it hadn't been invented because of how it's impacted us.

Katie asking herself if she feels acceptable without it... ohh that got me thinkin, girl.

Hedda pointing out that we can RELAX and be ourselves without it, seeing who are real friends are. so, so true!

Mo stating she feels wearing make-up is expected, so we do. interesting!

and many, many others! thanks again, everyone, for your incredible input!

my thoughts:

i've gotta go get ready to meet someone for tea, so this is a quick-fire version of my thoughts, uncensored. you've been warned!

personally, i've struggled with feeling physically unacceptable for most of my life, and make-up definitely played a part. i have chronic rosacea that for years left my skin blotchy, red, inflamed, and burning. when i looked in the mirror, it was all i saw! people would ask my if i had just been running, or if i was embarrassed. i hated my skin, so when i got old enough, i accepted that i was doomed to cover it for the rest of my life to feel pretty. this was probably around age 15.

since then, i've learned a few things about managing rosacea, but more importantly, i've learned about myself. quitting dairy and processed foods has made a huge difference in the blotchiness, but that's really quite minor in my eyes. in the last few years, i started digging deeper into why i felt the need to cover myself with a mask - why wasn't i acceptable without it, red skin and all?

i know plenty of my issues stemmed from dating a guy who wouldn't hang out with me unless i was in full make-up (yes, he was a keeper... NOT). but really, i wouldn't have listened to him unless i had already believed he was right. honestly, i agreed with him - showing my "flaw" to the world must not have been ok, so i hid behind a layer of foundation day in, day out... even in my dorm room!

the truth is, we all have flaws. it's called being a HUMAN BEING. and our "flaws" are what make us different. i know it's cheesy and we hear it all the time, but do you really believe it? really? and honestly, who was to say that their skin without rosacea was any more acceptable that mine with it? did it make me any less of a person? i think not (you could sub acne here, if that's your struggle).

once i realized that i was just as valuable, flaws and all, i started to relax. i realized that without make-up, you could see who i really was... and shockingly, i was alright! i have some pretty unique navy blue eyes, hair with a mind of it's own, and albino-white skin with a smattering of freckles. when i donned the daily mask, all these things were lost... and consequently, my identity was, too.

does this mean i think make-up is evil? surely not. i still enjoy swiping some mascara on my blonde eyelashes and feeling dramatic and flirty. i still use some shimmer powder to minimize the fibro/fatigue look from my eyes because, well, i get tired of looking tired. and i certainly don't think perfume is evil.

i guess i had to learn what make-up stood for in my eyes. i HAD to own that i was beautiful, unique, and acceptable without it before i could truly benefit from wearing it. and for the love of chocolate, i will beat up any guy who tries to tell another girl to just "put some make-up on." how about i just put my fist in your stomach???

in my opinion, some red flags to watch out for:

- do you feel less beautiful without it?

- do you feel there are situations you have to wear it?

- are you self-conscious without it?

- can you not go to the store, on a date, or in public without it?

- can you take a compliment when you don't wear it?

- are you not "yourself" without your face on?

- do you think other people/men will judge you or dismiss you without it?

if so, you may want to dig a little deeper. what's behind these feelings, and what can you do about it?

just my thoughts... agree/disagree?
-r

make this slaw!

2010-10-01T08:07:00.000-04:00

hey friends - i'm running an errand in Williamsburg with my mom today so i'm not sure when i'll get to it, but be looking out for my thoughts on make-up sometime this weekend!

photo: Happy Healthy Life.

in the meantime, make this asian slaw and die happy! i know it's crazy coming from a southern girl, but i'd never had slaw before because, um, i don't do mayo. i thought this mayo-free version sounded much less vomit-inducing, not to mention way more interesting (hello cumin seeds and coriander!).

i substituted a bag of trader joe's broccoli and carrot slaw for the cabbage, and used homemade tahini in the dressing! don't you guys just love it when you can use homemade stuff in recipes? i feel so domestic :)

am i weird in my mayo phobia? any mayo lovers out there (shudder)?

how do you feel about makeup?

2010-09-29T17:49:00.000-04:00

in typical rebekah fashion, i totally missed rabbit write's The No Make-Up Week Experiment last week.

source.

which is a bummer, because i had been planning to participate (i saw the rockin' post on medicinal marzipan, one of my favorite body image bloggers). so, instead of posting my experience make-up free (which is most days), i have a question for you guys.

for most of us, what does our need for make-up indicate we believe about ourselves?

p.s. - thank you all so much for your support yesterday! it's wonderful to finally have another piece to this puzzle of my health figured out. if anyone has any questions about going gluten-free or dealing with food allergies/intolerances, i would love to help you!

Kickin’ in the kitchin’.

2010-09-28T12:33:00.001-04:00

hey friends! (and happy tuesday, jess!)

thanks so much for your sweet words about my insomnia. i really appreciated all those who chimed in with personal experiences, but i wish you guys didn't struggle too! it breaks my heart that insomnia is so common these days, ya know?

by the way, if you're interested in extra better sleep tips, check out the expert advice in the comments from tatianna, both melissas, peace be me (what is your first name?), and bitt.

but now that we're all awake, how about a picture/recipe/life update, shall we? i finally found the darn escapist camera cord, so no more excuses for me. in no particular order, here are some recent happenings:

first day of school. look out VCU.

pinto bean and plantain stew, sans parsnip chips

this soup is crazy good! i didn't make the chips because i'm poor and parsnips are like gold around here, but hello - a little recognition for cooking with a plantain!!! they were on sale for 54 cents at ~~wal~~dirtmart, so one magically jumped into my cart somehow.

but no, your eyes don't deceive you - i did finally made a recipe from Veganomicon, one of the cookbooks i got for my birthday. i was super excited about this book specifically because i see jessica, matt, the other jess, the other other jess (haha ok enough), and many others refer to it as "the vegan bible" and cook from it fairly regularly. good enough for me!

... honestly? i hate to say this, but i was a tiny bit disappointed. for someone who doesn't see the appeal in "mock meat" or soy meat substitutes, i wasn't thrilled to see a good portion of the book devoted to seitan, tofu, and bean cutlets.

don't get me wrong - certainly all those things have their place in the freezer section, and if you dig 'em, it's totally cool! i'm just not a fan of eating food that mimics other food... if i wanted meat, i would eat it, ya know? i'm already cool with soybeans and black beans, so i don't feel the need to "transform" them into a substitute.

i like food that just is what it is. no imitations. but that's just my deal, yo.

spicy coconut curry squash soup

after i just ragged on their cookbook full of homemade tofurkey, i gotta give the ladies at the Post Punk Kitchen a shoutout... those girls can make some SOUP, man. hopefully that makes up for it?

i modified this recipe because, well, i had squash and not sweet potatoes, and can't leave well enough alone!

i made guac. alton brown's guac. no explanation needed.

and what's not pictured? in the last week or so, i've made gluten-free millet and flax crackers (like sami's bakery, but waaay cheaper), mom and i tag-teamed some delicious veggie bean chili, then some enchiladas (with beef for my brother, and without for us lettuce heads), various kitchen sink salads, gluten-free orange sweet potato muffins, quinoa coconut "rice pudding," homemade peanut butter and tahini, chocolate coconut cherry laraballs, pesto, and two kinds of hummus: roasted red pepper and jalepeno cilantro.

um, yeah. i've been busy. if you want details on how to recreate anything i made, comment or shoot me an email! mostly i just throw stuff in the pot and cook, but i'd be more than happy to share my "recipes" with you guys!

................................................................................

to continue on in this insanely random post, remember how i finally got around to a gluten-free trial? yes? well houston, we have a problem.

i gave it a month gluten-free before i "tested" my stomach again with my old foods, and let's just say that yes... it's clear that the remainder of my ibs issues are from gluten.

i won't die if i eat it (like when eating out), but for what i can control, i'm sticking with eating gluten-free. practically, it just means i avoid sandwiches and wheat pasta (almost everything in our kitchen is safe because of my sister), which is cool because i'm not a huge fan of those foods anyway. we have plenty of gluten-free bread should i get the urge for a sandwich, but that's pretty rare.

it's awesome though because i thought i was doomed to being bloated all my life, and hooray - no more! if you struggle with this, you might want to test for a gluten-intolerance... why not? and head's up you guys, unless i mention otherwise, the recipes i post from here on out will be gluten-free.

phew. you guys have been along for quite an interesting journey with me, no? now i leave you with the most hilarious food face i've seen in a while:

mom's blueberry goat cheese english muffin. oh snap, he has a moustache!

Attention.

2010-09-27T12:22:00.000-04:00

The best lunch I ever ate…

Cilantro jalapeno hummus + guacamole + quinoa, + side of carrot sticks.

Jesus loves me.

That is all.

sleep, and what to do when it's elusive.

2010-09-26T04:45:00.000-04:00

morning, sunshines!

hope my fellow americans are sound asleep right now, and everybody else, well, i still haven't figured out what schedule you guys are on, but i hope this finds you well!

it's about 3:30 AM right now, and i've been up and at 'em for a while now. this is the latest i've slept in quite a few days... strange, right? weirdly enough, i've actually gotten used to it and don't really mind it too much most days (insomnia is a really common part of fibromyalgia).

because of this new habit, though, i've been trying some new techniques to help me sleep, and thought i'd share a bit. so can we talk about sleep real quick?

source

i'm obviously no expert, or i'd still be sleeping right now! but i have tried a battery of different methods to deal with sleeplessness, and thought maybe my experiences would help you guys navigate your own potential issues (that i pray you don't ever have!).

ambien - i tried this drug when i first got diagnosed with fibro. it was a while ago, so i'm not sure how fair my evaluation is but i do remember it not working for me, and the little bit of sleep i did get made me terribly groggy when i took it. however, one of my good friends has used it for years and he swears by it, so i think it all depends on how your body chemistry reacts with it. i don't think i had any other side effects, so i'd say if you're desperate, it's worth a shot at least.

antidepressants - there is a strong connection between insomnia and decreased serotonin levels in the brain, which is also (not shockingly) a cause of depression. while i was on Prozac for a very short while in high school for depression, i recently was prescribed a different one (Lexapro?) to manage my sleep.

i know plenty of people who have amazing results with them for both depression and sleep issues, but my body does not like these kinds of drugs! i become paranoid like someone is "watching me," my heart races, and i sweat a lot... not good! i've always come off antidepressants quickfastandinahurry.

fibromyalgia prescriptions (Cymbalta, Lyrica, etc.) - fibro and nerve issues are characterized by a problem in the same part of your brain depression is, so many medicines prescribed for fibro are also prescribed as antidepressants. i know fibro doesn't apply to most of you (praise God!), but i just wanted to let you know my opinion on these medicines. i've met and heard from many people that thrive on them and feel like the meds have given them their lives back, and i'm very grateful for that! but for me, i would consider these meds a last resort: they are incredibly hard on your body. the process to adjust to them is severe, and the side effects can be crippling. i have never felt more like a zombie than when i was on these. just my thoughts!

melatonin - this is a natural supplement often used to promote healthy sleep patterns. it helps your "body clock" establish a sleep schedule. it took me a few weeks to realize that my problem wasn't my sleep patterns, but that i couldn't stay asleep. while melatonin did help me feel sleepy at the same time each night, i would still wake up after a few short hours. if staying asleep isn't your problem, just getting asleep in the first place, i would definitely recommend melatonin! i didn't experience any side effects, other than frustration :)

5-HTP - this is the supplement i'm currently taking. i just started taking it a few days ago, so the verdict is still out, but i have high hopes for this one. 5-HTP is the herbal version of tryptophan, which promotes raised serotonin levels in the brain (my problem in the first place!). i'll let you know how it goes!

SAMe - this is the next one i might consider trying. it is commonly used to help patients with chronic pain sleep through the night. a few nights i've realized it actually was the pain responsible for waking me up, so i feel it'd be worth a try possibly. SAMe is also a natural supplement, but it's a bit pricier than most supplements so i'm trying it last (college kid!).

tequila - haha i'm just kidding, i'm not getting that desperate!

...................................

i hope my experiences help shed some light on insomnia and the methods available to you, should you need it. we all go through times of struggling to sleep, and that's normal! when you do have that random, restless night, here are some things you should try:

- concentrating on relaxing breathing. take a deep, slow breath for a count of four, then slowly release it for a count of for. repeat ten times.

- don't allow your mind to run away with itself. nighttime is the time to shut off your mind. if you can't stop it from running, keep a notepad next to your bed and jot down all your thoughts before you sleep each night so you don't lay awake trying to remember something important.

- i know i sound like your mom, but establishing a routine is crucial. if you don't regularly go to bed around the same time, your body will constantly struggle to know when to sleep. please, please, please honor your body and its sleep patterns! we're big kids now - let's be responsible if at all possible.

- do something that deeply relaxes you before bed, as well as if you wake up in the middle of the night. meditate, pray, do some gentle yoga (one of my faves), stretch, or read a calming book (no stephen king!).

- don't turn on the light if you can help it, and use a small, soft glow to read by. your computer isn't a great bet because the screen can be stimulating to your brain. bright lights tell your brain it's morning, so this applies to going to pee, too!

- if all else fails and you're still awake 30 minutes later, get up! laying in bed will only stress you out and reinforce that sleepless pattern. do something quiet and non-stimulating until you feel sleepy.

- as much as possible, don't stress. yes, not sleeping sucks, but worrying about it pretty much guarantees you won't sleep, and that you'll feel like crap the next day. take one day at a time, and don't allow your mind to wander about how you'll function tomorrow. you can do this!

source

the best comfort i've had though my insomnia?

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 (New International Version)

this has been my battle cry for the last year or so. what a gift to know that even when i am an absolute wreck (which is often!), God still provides the opportunity for me to be powerful! i am capable of living this life victoriously even though i will struggle so much - praise God!

..........................................................

have you tried any sleep remedies?
what are your tips for sleeping well?
-rebekah

pet peeve.

2010-09-23T19:13:00.000-04:00

today's what the kale? moment:

"hey girl, i can't talk now, i'm on the way to the gym to earn my dinner. gotta burn some calories before i can eat!"

here's a fact:

if you're a human, you deserve food.

you kinda need it to live.

shocking, i know, but please, please, please just trust me on this.

do you ever hear disordered thoughts like this?
are you oblivious?
-rebekah

oy.

2010-09-23T11:04:00.000-04:00

hey rebekah, don't you have a blog?

... oh yeah. oops.

source.

hey friends! long time no see.

although you may have been concerned i fell off the face of the earth (logical conclusion sarah-mae!), rest assured i did not. i didn't really have intentions of abandoning you, i swear. and i've been slowly working my way through my google reader! i think i'm in the 400s now... oy vey.

in the last few weeks, i've been blessed beyond what i ever could have imagined: i went back at school (finally!), got plugged in to a new church i absolutely adore, and have started making incredible new friends. i've studied for challenging classes, worked a church yard/bake sale (thanks for the suggestions!), and met girls for coffee. i've hiked riverside trails in the crisp, fall air. i've laughed, cried, and went on a fabulous lunch date with my mom and sister. and praise jesus, we finally got a new blender! my raw vegan heart rejoices.

really, i'm incredibly, amazingly thrilled with life.

with exquisite beauty, however, there always comes unavoidable pain. for the last month or so, i've been up well before 4 a.m., struggled to keep food down, battled lonely, depressing days, limped from fibro pain, gotten runner's knee, and haven't ditched this stinkin' headache yet.

i'm still been facing some other pretty testy health issues, too. after going off the pill again, i'm still cycle-free (anyone have a solution to this?!?), and discovered i may not be the one lucky fibro patient without IBS... sigh/burp.

ok, so you're still with me? good. because of all these changes, i'm not really sure what the next few months will look like for me.

i'm kinda at a loss concerning the blog. over the summer, i had so many things i was dying to blog about: accepting our bodies, why i cut my hair, exercising efficiently, food labeling, and animal-free eating, to name a few.

i blogged on bad days, good days, and busy days. i couldn't wait to hop online and channel my passions into a post, hoping to encourage just one person to keep on keepin' on in their healthy lifestyle. but things change, and right now, i feel stuck.

i'm not the same person i was a year ago (phew!), and i'm not sure how the blog will follow that. after spending years researching nutrition and wellness and finally regaining positive body image (most days), i couldn't imagine blogging about much else! i actually still have a few post topics lined up when i'm ready to pull out more tidbits of trivia from this crazy brain of mine.

honestly? life is just different for me now. in case it hasn't been obvious in my posts, let me be transparent: i've sort of gone through a life overhaul in the last year or so. thankfully, i no longer waste my time on abusive relationships, distractions that numb emotional pain, or reckless friday nights "just because it's fun." i wish i could take credit for it, but everything really has been God working in me. seriously y'all, i'd be passed out in a drug-induced stupor in a ditch somewhere if it weren't for God's grace.

do i still love learning about health, exercise, food, and body image? you bet! but i guess my motives aren't in the same place. my priorities have changed.

now i'm rambling, and i don't know where i plan on taking the blog from here, but i do know this: anything i post i want to be straight from my heart to yours. i'm not as concerned with information anymore as i am concerned with people. this means my posts will be different, and i'm totally fine with that. if i post, i want to post on life: what God's been teaching me, lessons i've learned dealing with chronic illness, something that has cheered me up, recipes i've swooned over, and details from a body image workshop i'm taking at school.

i hope this doesn't alienate anyone. i love answering your questions and researching things with y'all more than anything, so shoot ideas/questions/comments for future posts my way!

y'all cool with that?

-rebekah

giveaway winner!

2010-09-16T18:06:00.000-04:00

and the winner of the $45 CSN giftcard is.................................................................................................................................................................................................................

The Crave to $ave!

congrats on your win! i'm jealous!

please email me at nelsonrr@mymail.vcu.edu so i can forward you the company's information!

thanks to everyone to participated, and i can't wait to catch up on all your blogs!
-rebekah

last call - giveaway!

2010-09-15T06:11:00.000-04:00

don't forget that my $45 CSN giftcard giveaway ends tonight, september 15th, at midnight... get those last-minute comments in to win that baby!

ok guys - i need your help. i'm working my church's yardsale saturday and want to bake things for the bakesale, but am not sure what to make! i've been thinking about making some kind of banana oatmeal muffin, some kind of cookie, and some kind of quick bread...

thoughts? suggestions? secret family recipes? thanks for your help!!!
-rebekah

national invisible illness week.

2010-09-14T07:04:00.000-04:00

hey friends! i'm still catching up on my INSANE google reader back-up, so bear with me! i really can't wait to get to read all your lovely posts!

i want to bring light to something that's close to my heart today. this week is National Invisible Illness Week, raising awareness for an issue i pray you guys never deal with.

1 of 2 americans will have a chronic illness at some point in their lives, and 96% of them won't be physically visible. whether it's diabetes, heart disease, chronic fatigue, or many others, each day millions suffer in silence. they look fine from the outside, but please don't underestimate the intensity of symptoms they hide behind their eyes. when you live with chronic illness, you learn many tricks to maintain some level of normalcy.

chronic illnesses can be depressing, heartbreaking, and make you feel it's not worth the effort to keep going. the best thing in the world to combat those emotions is knowing your life does matter.

this week, please take the time to remind someone that's sick of just that: their life matters. give them a (gentle!) hug. tell them how much they mean to you, and how brave they are. tell them they make you so proud, and how much you appreciate all their efforts.

some of my favorite incredible warriors, overcoming their daily obstacles?

melissa, from melissa nibbles
susan, from coffee and the paper
christie, from honoring health
sarah, from gluten free tries vegan
chuck, from feerless food
the daily bloggers from Rest Ministries
ayla, from high on healthy
nattie, from morsels of life

and many, many other sweethearts who have written me emails about their challenges, be they food allergies, chronic conditions, emotional eating, or family struggles. i am so blessed to know you all, and you keep me constantly amazed... i thank god for you!

please, will you join me in celebrating those lives that most definitely are worth the struggle?

is there someone with chronic disease in your life? what struggles do you see them face?

if you have an illness, what makes your day brighter?

-rebekah

hello fall, goodbye monday!

2010-09-13T22:03:00.000-04:00

hey fellas. busy, busy day today, but i wanted to stop in and say hi! how gorgeous is the weather near you? hello fall!

first of all, if you only make one recipe for all of september, please please please please please please make smitten kitchen's sesame peanut noodles. holy junk... those are some sexy noodles!

also, don't forget that you only have two days left to enter my giveaway! comment for your chance to win $45 dollars to any of CSN's websites! deadline for entry is by midnight on wednesday, september 15th. good luck, y'all!
-rebekah

pride comes before a fall.

2010-09-11T11:22:00.000-04:00

hey guys! i'm gonna keep ~~nagging~~ gently reminding y'all of my giveaway to win a $45 giftcard to CSN! enter before wednesday, september 15th at midnight to win sweet stuff!

and p.s. - i am absolutely thrilled to see all the new-to-me faces that entered! thank you so much for stopping by, and i can't wait to catch up on all your blogs!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

so i woke up this morning with a dull sense of dread. not because it was 3:00am (yeah, my body goes there quite often), but because i would need to eat again.

wait... what?

yes, those words came from my mouth. my mouth! yes, i'm still the same old rebekah who thought that i was doing wonderfully with my body like ten seconds ago, i promise. and yes, apparently i still have more issues hanging around than i realized.

maybe i should get this shirt.

source.

on a more serious note, though, for years i just let my emotions run away from me. i never stoped myself to figure out what was really wrong and why i was really struggling with food. i truly believed i must not have been strong enough to be skinny and never associated emotional stress with my eating habits.

instead, i absorbed every bit of knowledge i could from diet books, fashion magazines, and health articles. thank god that didn't last long! it took me a whole lot of blood, sweat, and tears to realize that my insecurities weren't about my body, but about my life!

i've felt (nearly) totally freed from the "diet mentality" for a while now, so i was a bit taken back to feel myself... dreading eating???

source.

during my run, i realized i was subconsciously still holding to some old baggage:

1. my new eating habits sorta scare me. eating to appease a testy fibromyalgia-y stomach is like trying to feed a colicky newborn: i eat all day long. while i know this is what my new body needs (hence this week's post about eating enough), to a chick who's had a few run-ins with binge eating, eating like this kinda can look "like a binge." i didn't realize i even still had that fear of binging, but i guess a few really hungry days was enough to bring those old feelings to the surface.

just to clarify, i haven't felt the need to emotionally eat in years, but i guess i still haven't gotten over the fear of possibility... follow me?

2. new schedule means packing and thinking about food A LOT. since i've been sick, i've basically been home all day. i've eaten when i was hungry and didn't really have to worry about packing it up, getting enough, or fitting in to a schedule. with school, all that changed. suddenly i had to plan my meals, and i think the sudden attention to how much food i actually eat in a day kinda freaked the old "diet rebekah" out. stupid, but true.

3. i break every get-slim-diet-trick daily. i eat almost entirely from the dreaded food group: carbs (*GASP*). i don't eat any of the recommended bikini diet foods: grilled chicken, egg whites, greek yogurt, nut butters, or protein shakes. half my diet consists of simple sugars: fruit. i eat about 50 times a day, don't drink water before meals, don't chew gum, don't distract myself from my hunger, and always eat after 7 pm. a lot.

do i know this is best for me? of course! would i change it? probably not. but that doesn't mean that every once in a while, i still don't wonder if i'm the crazy one. i mean, i'm crazy, but am i being food-stupid? i know the answer is no, but still, i'm not emotionally invincible.

so am i totally over my fears yet?

probably not. i am, however, very grateful for the body i do have, and am at peace with the lifestyle it takes to get this body out of bed each day. i know what makes me feel my best, and i also know my weight is fine! but this is all head knowledge. the heart is a touchier subject!

i see this as a life-long process for me, and at 21, it seems i still have a bit of growing up to do :)

thoughts?
struggles of your own you're working on?
-rebekah

to whom it may concern...

2010-09-10T06:55:00.000-04:00

sweet friends - don't forget to enter my super-easy-to-win giveaway to CSN Stores! it's a free $45, for cryin' out loud! comment before midnight on september 15th, and good luck!

..............................................................................................................................................

dear anonymous -

first of all, i wish you had left your name when you commented. this blog is a place where we embrace ourselves, and i don't like it when anyone feels they can't be who they are. not cool. but that's neither here nore there.

secondly, i want to thank you. no, seriously! you brought to mind an issue i've been struggling with, an important lesson that by god's grace i've accepted over the last year or two: the importance of not judging others.

when you commented on my weight, did you realize how that would crush me? although i am proud of who i am, i'm still human and vulnerable to criticism. did you stop and think about that before you pressed submit?

you mentioned how i looked "before i lost of bunch of weight..." did you know i lost that weight because i was bedridden? that i slept 20 hours a day and just got up to pee? that i had to call my mom to carry me down the stairs? i didn't crash-diet, i was in a medicated coma. not shockingly, food wasn't too appealing. it took energy, and i didn't have any. simple as that.

if you had been in contact with me over the last few years, you would have know that i've desperately struggled with my body. praise God that improving body image is now one of my biggest passions. and i still struggle with eating enough and exercising to this day. i still am so grateful for each mile i can walk, because there was a time i couldn't walk any. did you know that?

all questions aside, that's not what i'm thanking you for. i appreciate your comment because it brought to light a realization i've had since i got sick that's worth mentioning: who am i to judge anyone because of their body?

source.

when i see someone walking down the street, the only thing i know about them is their appearance. how on earth do i think i have any business commenting on what they look like, when i don't know them? i hate to admit i used to gossip mercilessly about anyone i deemed too fat, dressed too slutty, or wore too much makeup.

the second i opened my smart mouth, all i accomplished was showering my pride, arrogance, and hate on everyone around me. i thought i was better than this person because in my mind, i wasn't "too" anything (although i did hate my own body, but that's another story). how it shames me to even admit that! sadly, it took me years before i could face my own shortcomings, realize God is the only true Judge, and in turn accept we all struggle, we all have flaws, and we all have a story behind them.

that critically obese person at the store? they are an incredible gift of God. who knows what they are struggling with in their own life? people have no more or less worth because of their weight, and if i truly cared about their health, i would pray for their lives and heart instead of mocking their body. that trashy-looking girl at the movies? who knows what she's been through? what does she deal with on a daily basis that i've only seen in movies? if i really cared, i would hug her instead of condemn her. that girl whose bones jut out from her skin? after the weight struggles i've gone through, if anyone loves this girl, it should be me. how dare i make her as the butt of my jokes, when i've been that girl! i could be the one voice she needs to keep believing there's hope in life, and each time i criticize her, i confirm her worst fears.

there's been a huge focus on self-love over the last few weeks, and i'm thrilled! before you can help others, you certainly must deal with yourself.

but sometimes, i think it's easy to forget the power in our words. it's not just about fat-talk, although that's a pretty big deal. more than that, though, we need to deal with what doesn't happen when we judge - love. when we choose to criticize someone, not only do we reenforce our own negativity, but we sever any chance we had to positively impact that person, and that might have been the only kind word they got for quite some time.

next time we're tempted to judge, let's own up to the fact it probably comes from our own insecurities. how about we stop and consider what they're going through first, or compliment them instead? we have millions of opportunities to impact lives for the better - why not take them?

so anonymous, thanks for bringing that up, and thanks for reconfirming what i already knew to be true - because i am wonderfully made, i treat my body right. because i treat my body right, i accept what i see in the mirror. because i accept what i see, what you see doesn't threaten me. i know who i am and the victory that my life is. do you, anonymous?

are you aware of how your words impact others?

what can we do to build others up instead of tear them apart?

- rebekah

gift card giveaway!

2010-09-08T17:01:00.001-04:00

it's my first giveaway! woohoo!

CSN is an awesome parent company of shopping websites, with everything from bistro sets and gym equipment to baby shoes and blenders. check them out!

the $45 gift card can be used at any of their sites, on anything your little heart desires (my heart desires these shoes).

you don't have to write a blog to win! however, it's for US and canada residents only :( so sorry foreign friends! i love you guys too.

how to win? please pick at least one of the following:

1. for one entry: introduce yourself! and leave me a comment about how you discovered my humble baby blog.

2. or one entry: leave me a comment telling me the first thing you'd buy if someone handed you $45.

3. for five entries: blog about the giveaway, and leave five seperate comments telling me you did!

4. for five entries: twitter about the giveaway, and leave five seperate comments that you did with your twitter name (so i can follow you!)

make sure to get your entries in by next wednesday, september 15th at midnight (wherever you are).

good luck y'all! i'll announce the winner on thursday's post.

- rebekah

ask me anything, and a body image week ramble.

2010-09-07T09:15:00.000-04:00

mornin' sunshines! today is a crazy-full day for me, so i am typing at warp speed right now... forgive my certain typos (i just wrote typeos - case in point).

sidenote: apparently the last few days i've been struggling with google images to get good pictures for the blog, so certainly unrelated, but kinda funny/true/thought-provoking at the same time:

source.

two quick thoughts for today:

1. thank you, thank you, thank you to all the amazing voices who chimed in on my little animal-free series over the last week or so, but also, thanks to all who read! you guys are seriously my joy in writing.

but seriously, though - this isn't a one-sided blog. i want to be a research buddy, a source of encouragement, and someone to bounce thoughts off of... no matter what you eat!

i really appreciate the folks who commented something different than i wrote, or added something i missed. my dear friend christie's comment on yesterday's vegan misconceptions post reminded me that i still i want to write much more about approaching nutrition in general, not just animal-products, so stay tuned for that (and a post on iron absorption!). if you have anything you're curious about or want to hear my thoughts on, please comment or shoot me an email! there seriously is no such thing as a stupid or pointless question.

2. september 5-12th is national body image and eating disorders awareness week (BIEDAW) in australia. to all my australian friends (and everyone else!), i hope you realize how incredibly beautiful your life is! i seriously couldn't be more in awe of how incredible the human body is - in every size, race, and gender. amazing.

because of this, i've been thinking about body image a lot. this is a bit of a ramble, but here's some of my uncensored thoughts:

i guess i've felt that god has mostly healed me from my negative thoughts in the last few months, so i haven't posted a lot on body image. i should change that, now that i think about it... but anyways, in celebration of body image and ed week, i want to update y'all on this new phase in my story: the victory we can find in knowing numbers AND not caring.

i've written about my body image struggles before, so i am sensitive about posting weight/calories/pant size/etc. you aren't me, are you? so why would my weight effect your health? it's too easy to judge and get fixated on details that aren't important in life and can lead to destruction.

if you follow me on twitter, you might have caught a glimpse of my excitement yesterday:

@bekahraenels:
To all the girls who think you have to starve to stay in shape, DON'T! i prob ate 3,000+ cals and my pants STILL FIT! You are beautiful TODAY

about 13 hours ago via txt
my point? when you embrace nourishing your body for health, what that looks like to others might seem strange.

do i eat like a man? yes. am i the strongest i've ever been in my life? yes! how? I EAT GOOD FOOD WHEN I'M HUNGRY. i don't get emotional if my "i-haven't-broken-the-calorie-counting-habit-completely-yet" brain says WOAH YOU JUST ATE 1,000 CALORIES IN ONE SITTING. because you know what? i needed them! and i feel great after eating them!

it's an incredible moment when you can acknowledge reality about life, how it applies to you, and accept it peacefully. i've been testing that in my diet over the last few weeks, and it was a huge victory to discover how many calories i was eating and SMILE because i didn't care. i've just accepted my new, healthier, active, incredibly strong body needs a lot of food. want a number? between 2,500 and 3,500 calories.

i wasted years jumping through all the "right" hoops to manage my weight: i never ate fried foods. i denied myself incredible desserts at parties. i counted calories. i didn't eat at night. i exercised up to 2 hours a day, 6 times a week. i ate my fruits and veggies. i read nutrition labels like it was my MCAT.

none of that was effective at anything other than making me miserable. in my heart, i never felt adequate. sadly, it took an uncurable disease before i realized i can be happy with life the way it is RIGHT NOW because that's all i have.

i'm not scared to post those calories because my life proves starvation is NOT the only way! please reexamine that logic... your body deserves so much more! also, i love throwing people for a loop, and it totally tickles me to death that it's not kosher to like your body and be a girl... but you know what? I LOVE THIS BODY.

you heard right folks. shockingly, my body is ok today, and it was ok yesterday, and it will be tomorrow too. and yeah, it's still ok if i eat cake.

GASP. i said it. sue me.

god's been teaching me that peace with myself spills over in other areas of my life, too. i go to bed at 9-something pm every night, didn't party on my 21st birthday and don't drink, don't like dessert, and my mom is my best friend. i love moving my body and am thrilled with how god's given me the strength after weeks of being confined to my bed. and the most increible gift? after years of trying to find my worth in getting guys' attention, i'm perfectly content being single and living life one day at a time.

so yeah, here i am world. i'm 21, right-handed, can fit in kids' clothes, have bloodshot eyes and a smart mouth, and a fiery temper that blows up in ethics class. but that's neither here nor there. what's imporant is i could have written anything and been equally satisfied. woah nelly, and praise god.

life is miraculous: don't miss living because of details.

if you're australian, how will you participate?
if you aren't, what do you embrace about your body?
-rebekah

part three: misconceptions on plant-based diets.

2010-09-06T22:44:00.001-04:00

happy labor day to my american friends!

i tried to google a good picture to celebrate, but all the image results were either pictures of hamburgers or skanky myspace girl pictures... strange. so just imagine my post looks festive!

i hope no matter where you are in the world, y'all have an awesome day today!

part three: common misconceptions about animal products.

source.

can everyone thrive on a plant-based diet?

to answer simply, yes it's possible. will everyone? maybe.

i've talked with many friends who feel like their bodies "just don't work" without meat. but logically, let's examine animal products for what they are: nutrients, just like any other food. anything you can get from animal products, you can get elsewhere. there's nothing magic about them - animals get their vitamins from the same places we do: plants!

however, you must be conscious of what you're doing. research very thoroughly! being a vegan does not equal being healthy - it's not a free pass to go all willy-nilly at the supermarket! it's simpler and requires less effort to eat meat, eggs, and dairy, but it is entirely possible for everyone to thrive without them. your success and health are largely determined by whether you're willing to make the effort responsibly (like so many things in life!).

what about vegans who "go back" to eating animal products?

people give up eating animal-free for many different reasons. mostly, i meet people that don't feel "right" eating vegan, or just don't feel like themselves (like i said earlier). i've felt the same way myself!

the reason they feel off isn't because of an absense of meat - it's the absense of something meat delivered to their diets. remember, meat isn't mysterious, or magical. it could be the fat, the protein, or the nutrients they're missing, but if they add those missing elements back into their diets to regain that balance, they should see dramatic improvements.

whether you eat meat or not, we all have specific needs to help us feel our best. eating meat is not a free pass to thoughtlessness, and neither is veganism. like any life change, it takes your body a while to adjust.

it's also worth saying that veganism is not a trendy diet. it won't solve all your problems, or make you fit in your skinny jeans. it won't move mountains or single-handedly save your life (but maybe!). it's not a religion, and it shouldn't be a source of guilt. people adjust to things at their own pace, and what's on your dinner plate should never be used as a weapon against you to belittle you or humiliate you.

what about supplements?

if you guys are familiar with my story, you know i am a big fan of nutritional supplements. i also believe that since we've become so intent on destroying our environment (thank you pollution/factory farming/BP!), our soil quality has been depleted tremendously. i honestly don't know that even the most "perfect" diet could provide what we need nutritionally anymore, and i think living the lifestyles we do in that environment has only made our nutrient requirements increase.

because of this, i would recommend everyone take a high-quality multi-vitamin. just find the best one you can and be consistent - that's the key. also, if you don't want cancer, please start taking an anti-oxidant supplement.

everyone is quick to point out vegans need b-12, and that's true... but so does everyone else! if you got a good multi-v, it should provide most everything you need, but be sure to double-check. most cereals and breads come fortified these days, so that makes it simple as well.

anything else you may be missing can easily be found in nature. even pain relivers originally came from plants :) all in all, don't take yourself too seriously, and remember the point in all this - achieving your best health!

questions that i forgot?
how do you feel about animal products?
how have you felt about this vegan post series?
-rebekah

questions answered: factory farming.

2010-09-05T07:49:00.003-04:00

hey guys. thank you so much for your honesty on my factory farming post! i'm always blown away by how supportive, thoughtful, and totally open you guys are. you guys rock!

you guys asked some awesome questions i really couldn't wait to answer, so here we go!

source.

1. jess asks: are organic dairy cows treated better than traditional, and which to buy - organic dairy or local dairy?

erm... well, this is a tricky one. most organic dairy companies are just a branch of the parent factory farm brand (like how Dannon owns Stonyfield Farms). because of this, i am inclined to say no, they aren't treated better. for the majority of what's on your grocers shelves, organic doesn't mean humane - it means no added hormones, antibiotics, or GMOs, and that's it (assume all non-organic dairy does have added r-bst - bovine growth hormone).

the reason why i'm inclined to say local dairy is better is because, like mishe said, it's almost the only way you can actually know how your food is produced. if you know your farmer, you're much more likely to get an accurate picture of what's going on behind their closed doors.

i do, however, still have issues with dairy: unless your dairy comes from a tiny, family-run farm with a diverse range of animals, dairy comes from a dairy farm (i'm intelligent, yes?). dairy farms only have dairy cows, and the sole purpose of these cows is to make milk. you know how they produce milk all year round? they are continuously impregnated. as you can imagine, this is incredibly hard on their bodies, and not natural at all.

also, please know that the dairy industry is subsidized by the government. not to preach anarchy or anything, but it's a monopoly that is rapidly wiping out our family farms - the government now owns 86% of the dairy industry. for every TV ad you see promoting dairy, the government makes millions. so when they promote eating 3 servings a day for strong bones, should you believe them? they also are the source of funding for studies on the health of milk, so is it really shocking to discover that milk is "healthy?" they paid millions for the scientists to "discover" that!

it's worth noting that other countries that do not consume dairy on a regular basis do not have a higher risk of osteoporosis, and usually have less cancer and heart disease. i'm sure there are many reasons for this, but it seems dairy isn't the determining factor on bone health after all. and just a final gross-out for ya? if it's not bad enough that 50% of milk-producing cows have mastitis (an infection of the mammary glands), the USDA allows a percentage of PUSS, FECAL MATTER, and BLOOD in even organic milk! blegghhh!!!

2. daniel asks: what's a good alternative to yogurt?

two thoughts on this: one is check out your local health food store for coconut milk yogurt. more nutritious than dairy and de-lic-ious! there's also soy yogurt, but i'm not a huge fan of processed soy products. another good substitute is to make a smoothie, or fruit ice cream.

my second thought is a little hardcore, but hear me out. when i gave up meat, i searched a while for a "substitute." i didn't want to eat fake meat because it weirds me out, but i couldn't figure out what to eat instead. it took me a few weeks to realize it wasn't about replacing what i cut out, but exploring a whole new world of foods i hadn't ever tried yet!

how easy something is to live without is really all in your attitude - true in all areas of life. if you feel deprived and focus on what you're losing, of course you'll be unhappy! but there's two sides to this, and don't forget what you're gaining. nothing tastes good enough to negate the health benefits, impact on the environmont, and enormous impact on animals that giving up dairy brings, and coming from the girl who used to eat a family-sized container of greek yogurt in two days, i'm proof anyone can do this!

we live with our little routine of foods we're comfortable eating since birth, but the reality is there are thousands of options out there! while i understand that yogurt is ridiculously good, may i suggest opening your mind to countless undiscovered, delicious snacks instead? it might just change your life! most of us eat yogurt for that creamy texture, so seek it out in other natural foods, like avocados, peaches, and oatmeal.

and if you are blessed by the vita-mix gods, you can really make whatever you want! try some protein ice cream (with no added gums, please!) or a dairy-free ice cream recipe, and send me your thoughts/suggestions! i like ice cream, too!

3. chuck said: i love meat, but what can we do to improve the meat industry?

honestly, i'm not too optimistic here. maybe i'm just a trippy-dippy-hippie, but in my experience, government involvement + huge profit margin = slow to change. factory farms make tons of profit, so i doubt we'll see a quick shift away from one of the US' biggest growing money-makers.

a little background on modern farming: farms used to be a diverse, sustainable culture. they needed all different kinds of plants and animals together to keep the land and livestock healthy. at some point around the 1930's, farmers started to realize they could make more money by creating a monofarm - a business on raising one type of product. it's been so successful in our generation, it's almost impossible to find a farm today that isn't a monofarm.

while it certainly makes more money, our generation is forced to live with the consequences: soil completely stripped of nutritients (which grows almost vitamin-less food), antibiotic-resistant bacteria (did you wonder where swine flu came from...?), and holes in the ozone layer (which most are conveniently located over the largest farms, such as smithfield, butterball, and purdue). ever heard of the term "over-fed but under-nourished?" you can thank factory farms for that.

my advice on how to improve farm conditions? use your dollars! politicians might not care about what you personally think, but companies listen to what you buy. if we keep buying their products, they'll keep creating new ways to provide for the demand. next time you're in the store, ask yourself what statement are you making to big businesses by the contents in your cart - who gets your money?

no, i'm not blissfully ignorant, but it's not hard to see that if no one bought mcdonalds, they would go out of business. and yes, your groceries do have an effect on our economy! no one person can change the world, but we can change our own lives for our own benefit. and besides, just because we can't completely change something doesn't mean we have to continue supporting it. i don't want to waste my life thinking "instead of being scared, what if i had only ________?"

so we must read our labels, do our research, and ask ourselves honestly - do we really need animal products all day long? not until very recently did humans base their diet on it, and there's just no way companies can safely, healhfully, and cleanly produce enough to keep up with our appetites.

what's more important to us - having chicken, yogurt, and tacos as much as we want, or something other than our cravings? it's a convicting question i ignored, side-stepped, and struggled with for many years.

like mishe brought up, if we can't find an affordable, healthy, humanely-produced product, instead of just complaining and buying crap anyways, how about we just not buy it!

source.

a few final thoughts?

daniel made a great point that i totally am in love with - it's not about meat-eaters vs. vegans, but health and changing what's happening on our farms, and we need everyone's help!

my intentions are always to be informative, in as ashley said, "a non-judgment, non-push-it-down-my-throat kind of way." please know i love you all dearly and am so proud of you when you treat your bodies right! you guys have such diverse, awe-inspiring stories.

it might shock you to know i don't have anything against eating animals - contrary to most vegans, i believe God created us to eat meat. but what i cannot stand is when we exploit others for our benefit. treating animals no better than garbage is not only cruel, but also completely wasteful of a wonderful resource we have. we are destroying our planet and mutilating one of our best sources of sustenance, and for what? money? wealth? power? that's not justifiable in my book, and i don't want anything to do with such corruption and absolute arrogance.

and please please please, if you have any more questions, i'd love to pursue them with you! let's get our minds and hearts opened, and start talking about the things we've always wanted to ask. this is a place that's safe to ramble, think out loud, or express frustrations!

anything else i missed?

-rebekah

behind closed doors...

2010-09-04T21:58:00.001-04:00

heller fellers!

how are ya? it's your resident dork checking in :)

you know that post i wrote on interpreting food labels? well, since i can't leave well enough alone, i just had to write about the other side of our food, too. what most of us don't even know exists.

ever overheard someone talking about what's in your food, only to shout "LA LA LA I DON'T WANNA KNOW!!!"?

source.

yeah... guilty as charged. i pretty much lived that my whole life until mom got sick. funny how when your heart gets involved, your perspective on life starts to change, right?

fast forward a few years, and i'm still on the same path - researching, pondering, and learning. fortunately (and unfortunately), some discoveries have ended up really disturbing me (i'm looking at you, MSG!). i stumbled on my most recent freak-out researching factory farming techniques for the labels post, and details i couldn't shake just. kept. haunting me.

all that to say, i pour my heart and soul out to you guys. anything that breaks my heart, fires me up, or makes me sing with joy, you guys hear about it. so this isn't my attempt to "convert" or guilt-trip anyone - it's simply my desperate desire to see each one of you thrive. i want you to live your BEST life!

the following practices are standard procedure at america's farms. as in, you'd be hard-pressed to find an exception in the grocery store. any exception (currently 99% of animal products in the US). this is the state of america's industry.

artificial insemination - to make more profit, farmers feed their livestock to grow as large as physically possible. one of the downsides is that farm animals can't reproduce on their own - yes, i'm telling you they can't physically have sex. almost 100% of turkeys, 85% of pork, and 75% of beef must be artificially impregnated to reproduce because of their bodies genetic modifications (and turkeys often die of heart attacks before they make it to slaughter due to their enormous breasts).

battery cages - most common practice of housing egg-laying hens. these cages are smaller than a sheet of printer paper, which means the hens live and die without ever stretching their wings, and most are never able to stand up, causing osteoporosis. the cages are stacked many stories high, and when the hens on the higher levels poop... well, you can imagine what the ones below look like. the percentage of eggs with salmonella is exponentially higher in battery cage eggs than on that of a traditional laying farm (hello, recent outbreak?!?).

embryo transfer - similar to artificial insemination, farmers use this technique to control the genetics of their livestock. they impregnate their best female for choice genetics, then extract the embryo and impregnate a lesser quality female to carry the pregnancy so they can more quickly re-impregnate the genetically superior female. the high quality female's DNA ensures she will constantly be pregnant.

debeaking/branding/castrating - egg chickens' beaks are removed with a superheated knife to prevent attacking other chickens out of stress. chronic pain, infection, and starvation are not uncommon. branding and castrating are routinely practiced without anesthesia, and also cause chronic pain.

gestation crates - cages pregnant cows are transferred to in an effort to quicken pregnancy weight gain and ensure the babies are not crushed. the crates prevent standing or turning around for months at a time, and the pregnant cows often crack their skulls or chew through the cage out of boredom.

veal - obviously, dairy cows are only females, so when they have males, farmers turn to producing veal - a tender, expensive cut of beef. how do they make it so tender? the boys are kept confined from birth to prevent their muscles from being toughened through exercise, and are slaughtered between a few days to a few weeks after birth.

by-catch - all living things caught unintentionally while fishing. most fishermen drag their nets from the boat to the sea floor, bringing up everything in its path. they pick out only the species they sell (like salmon fishermen only keep mature salmon) and throw everything else back. by-catch wouldn't be so bad except most other fish die in the catch process - a ratio as high as 30:1 dead by-catch to the fish they're actually fishing for. today, most endangered aquatic species face extinction not because of over-fishing them, but because of by-catch.

slaughter - i won't really go into too much detail here because i get kinda gaggy thinking about it, but suffice it to say that farm animals are paralyzed, hung upside down, their throats slit, electrocuted alive, then boiled alive so their skin peels off nice and easy. yum.

spent hens - when chickens get too old to lay eggs, farmers pass them through the wood chipper. the ground-up parts are reused in feed for the rest of the laying hens. since boy chickens can't lay eggs, they usually suffocate them in a dumpster.

environmental effects - factory farms use 70% of the US' water, produce 130 times the waste of US' human population, 22% of greenhouse gases, and cause exponentially more pollution than the automobile industry. they defile the surrounding bodies of water, spoil the soil, and produce a "manure mist" that causes thousands of deaths, chronic diseases, and illnesses nationwide. each factory farm owns many tank dumps that are many stories high where they store the waste of the animals. for more impacts on the environment, check this out.

and for another resource on animal welfare, look here. it's written by an animal activist, so their opinions are obviously biased, but the treatment techniques are fairly universally practiced.

* as always, i spend countless amounts of time on my figures, and i stand behind what i post. if you are curious about my research or want to know more, please email me!

i've said it before, and i'll say it again: i will never judge you for your dinner. i'm not an animal lover or a peta supporter... i just beg you to make an informed decision! i hope this helps open up a world that maybe you haven't heard of before. nothing will change if we don't have access to the whole picture.

thoughts?
-rebekah

owning it.

2010-09-03T11:57:00.000-04:00

once again, the beautiful rachel wilkerson has blown up the blog world. after posting about something she wasn't ashamed of, girls all over have been realizing there's no reason to hide who you are.

naturally, i approve of this movement, and hopped right on the bandwagon.

what am i "owning?"

i'm opinionated and passionate.

and no, i'm not sorry.

will i step on a few toes? um... i already have.

will some people not like me? probably.

am i scared? sometimes.

do people point and laugh? yeah, sure, when i act like a total goober.

but you know what?

i'm true to myself. i know who i am. life matters to me.

and i'll never again pretend to be someone i'm not, just to please someone else. don't try to put me in a box.

so i'm owning it.

what are you owning?

-rebekah

what's that REALLY mean?

2010-09-02T10:29:00.000-04:00

gooooooooooood morning everybody!

source.

how is everyone? i feel like i've been a little out of the loop here recently! i've been doing my own thing here the last few days - school, researching, and sorting through emotions - and haven't really had a chance to dive into google reader. bear with me... your posts are important to me, too!

and i really can't thank you all enough for your support during my little blog break. seriously - you guys blow me away with your kindness. i am so grateful for each one of you!

something i find noteworthy? checked google stats today for the second time... and gotta love the people that land on my blog after searching "muffin love letter." well, i hope they found what they were looking for.

source.

ok, but seriously though, i finally finished researching that post i've been going on about for days.

it's my desire for every person to have information available to them about what they're eating. the decision they make with it afterwards is theirs, but i believe we all at least deserve access to that knowledge. if we can have the calorie count of our soup posted at restaurants, why can't we know what's in it?

as a disclaimer: if you're struggling with emotional eating or disordered thoughts, please realize that this post shouldn't be your biggest concern. like i've said before, emotional health always triumphs food quality... please take care of your heart and mind first! there's plenty of time to deal with the grocery store later, and please know you can ALWAYS email me. always.

i used to have very distinct impressions about what product labels meant. to me, "cage-free" chicken sounds like the good life: grass to roam on, no tiny cage, pecking their food off the ground. old school, ya know?

it wasn't until i started reading about farming procedure that i realized most food companies use labels to confuse us. they want us to have those quaint little visions about where our food comes from so we feel confident purchasing their products over and over. when something says natural, aren't you more likely to buy it? of course! but do you really know what natural means?

source.

terms you'll encounter at your market, and what they mean*:

wild-caught - fish caught by net. can be raised for up to 50% of their lives in hatchery farms, fed grains/farm feed, and released to be re-caught later.

fresh - frozen fish that has been thawed upon arrival. for the most part, the same fish that's in your freezer section, thawed for you.

free-range - access to outdoors. no requirements on the size of cages, size of range, or how frequent (if ever) animals can access the outdoors (usually gravel).

cage-free eggs - exactly that - no wire cage. no regulations on other conditions (space per chicken, food, access to outdoor access).

grass-fed - raised without grain feed until deemed mature (3-6 months old), then transported to feedlots for fattening until slaughter. not organic, and still receive hormones/antibiotics unless otherwise certified.

natural - can be applied to nearly any food, as long as at least one ingredient is derived from products of plants or animals (can you think of one that's not?). not monitored/regulated by the FDA/USDA.

natural flavors - similar to "natural," any additive approved for the use in food that was once derived from something in nature. no standards for processing.

genetically modified organism (GMO) - product that has new genetics produced in a lab. viruses used to transfer DNA to new product. unless your product is marked organic or NON-GMO, assume it's a GMO (92% of soy, 80% corn, 70% all packaged products, almost all wheat bread).

organic - approved by USDA, avoids most chemicals (38 synthetics considered exceptions), GMOs, and sewage sludge (say wha?), grown on pesticide-free land for at least 3 years, contain at least 95% organic ingredients.

made with organic ingredients - ingredients must be at least 70% organic, other 30% may be GMOs.

certified naturally grown - holds the same standards as organic, but approved for smaller farmers who cannot afford the label.

certified humane - treated with no hormones or antibiotics, free to roam with no cage, processed as gently as possible (regulated by the ASPCA's welfare program)

raw - non-pasteurized/homogenized, or treated with heat not exceeding 105-118 degrees (depending on source).

* this is a compilation of research i've been working on for a few weeks to ensure accuracy. if you would like the link to my sources, shoot me an email and i will track them down for you. all my information came from government/nationally-funded sources, such as the FDA, USDA, ASPCA, MyPyramid, and PBC, cross referenced with general knowledge, such as Wikipedia and news sources)

source.

i hope by defining labels of what we're buying, we see a more accurate picture of what we're eating and make informed decisions.

this certainly isn't the whole story. there surely are a few farmers who are genuine, but unfortunately, they're in the minority in the US. do you know your farmer? wonderful! ask lots of questions, get to know their procedures, where they get their livestock, and make a relationship with them - they are potentially the closest thing to natural. now if only they could get their products into the supermarket...

do you buy a product for the labels?

what do you buy straight from the farmer?

-rebekah

working out effectively: part two.

2010-08-31T09:03:00.001-04:00

hey guys - long time no see!

i feel like i am slowly being restored these last few days (all credit to god!). it's been a long week of blood, sweat, and tears, but it's amazing how much he's healed me since my disasterous late teens - i'm (mostly) stable now. even in the middle of heart break, i know there is peace and a PURPOSE for this.

anyways, i gotta get boogie-ing on down to school here soon, but i wanted to bang out this thought real quick before my runner's high wears off.

this morning, i realized how different my perspective is on a "good workout." i used to get so frustrated by not being fast enough, not logging enough miles, being out of shape, my shorts pinching my stomach, my shoes not fitting... you get the picture. i had this standard of how you SHOULD exercise, and i was certainly not living up to it.

i thought frustration was just a necessary part of being "healthy" (at the time, that meant skinny), but my body wasn't the problem - it was my expectations.

my tip, if you want to call it that, on how to love moving your body?

tackle one challenge at a time.

get new shoes? ok, your goal is to just get comfortable.

just start walking after a few years break? sweet. make it your goal to just DO IT.

coming back from an injury/illness? just move pain-free.

going through a major life change? enjoy some free exercise therapy!

see what i'm saying? i used to give up on working out because i thought i had to be fast AND efficient AND skinny AND committed AND loving every step AND a morning person... yada yada.

taking one step at a time allows you to focus and be encouraged about what you actually can accomplish! it also helps you track your progress, because you can easily tell how you're feeling in that area. take your time - you are worth it! it's not a race, right?

the best things i've ever done for my workouts?

- leave my watch/garmin/heart rate monitor at home. i am not a performance athlete, why do i care about time? my body certainly doesn't.

- stop counting my miles. don't get me wrong, accomplishing a goal is a good thing, but please don't tell yourself you have to do that everyday.

- stop comparing myself to other exercisers and their habits. it's my LIFEstyle, not a test of committment or a popularity contest.

- do what you LOVE. if you hate running, don't do it! do cycling, tennis, aerobics classes, volleyball, etc. instead. life is way too short to be stuck doing something you hate just to check working out off the to-do list. i highly doubt you'll get to the end of your life and regret not getting on the elliptical more when you despised it.

- just be YOU. i promise you will be so much happier with yourself if you just do what YOU feel comfortable with, and nothing more. there's no exercise judge. this isn't american idol - just feel good that you did an amazing thing for your body today!

i'm sure you guys have many helpful thoughts on the matter: what would you like to change about your exercise mentality, what expectations do you have of yourself, and what have you learned that's helped you accept your own exercise habits?
-rebekah

hey there stranger.

2010-08-29T14:34:00.000-04:00

well, i don't have much to say for myself. twice i've promised you a wonderful post, and twice i've gone A.W.O.L.

do you guys ever have something terrible happen, then dive into distractions so you're too busy to be heartbroken? yeah... i've sorta been collecting those experiences for a while. in the last few days, i started to realize what i was doing (like i did in high school), and knew i had to face myself at some point. why not just get it over with?

but to be honest? it's been a terrible, scary, and emotional last few days, but i'm finally edging towards peace. i'm finally letting god heal those scars left from losing my best friend, the fear of the unknown, and my crippling loneliness. i'm finally accepting i'm not strong enough to hold it all together, but i don't have to be.

am i planning on writing that post on factory farming terms? why yes, yes i am. that's for sure.

but not today.

instead, i want to enourage you to be kind to yourself. give yourself have time to heal, to mourn, and to learn. you can't help anyone else if you don't take care of yourself first!

thanks for being patient with me, friends, and i seriously can't thank you guys enough for your support and sweet words. i light up each time i get a comment because i know it's going to be so encouraging!

so for the third time, i'll be back!
-rebekah

i might have spoken too soon.

2010-08-26T18:32:00.000-04:00

hey y'all - i had my first day of school today, and i'm absolutely, 100% pooped. it went pretty well with a few speed bumps, but i made it! and if you follow me on twitter, you already know i discovered i'll probably be arrested in my ethics class before the year is over with... yikes.

source.

i have an awesome post swirling in my mind about food marketing/labeling, but i just can't bang it out tonight... forgive me? i plan on attacking it tomorrow or saturday, so hang in there with me!

in the mean time, check out gena's post on the whys and hows of eating. it ties in perfectly with my food posts the last few days, but she is so much more eloquent than i am.

my question for y'all tonight is: what do you look for when you shop for food? quality, price, local, ingredients... what ends up in your cart and why?

-rebekah

the bottom line.

2010-08-25T20:45:00.000-04:00

happy humpday friends!

today was seriously an awesome day. i ordered a new running band for my ipod,

got my tattoo (!!!),

bad picture... it's a bit hard to take one on the back of your dominant arm!

talked on the phone with the beautiful christie,

and got birthday presents in the mail!

can i just say how exciting today was!?!?

sometimes i just have to stand back and take it all in... i am so blessed, you guys. so much more than i deserve!

i can't wait to dive headfirst into those books... i've been wanting them forever, but wouldn't buy them for myself! college is expensive, you know?

for those of you who have the books, what recipes do you love?

...............................................

i feel like i should have mentioned this yesterday, but better late than never, right? i want to share what i consider the most important facet of our diets: putting them in perspective.

from yesterday's comments, it seems the general consensus is that there are distinct kinds of eaters: vegans/vegetarians, and meat-eaters. while this might be technically true, i want to propose a different outlook.

eating isn't meant to be meat versus veggies. i see it as eaters pursuing information we deserve to know!

i don't think veganism is perfection, and i certainly don't see meat as sinful! i think sometimes we get caught up in technicalities of our diets (do you eat eggs? milk? raw? organic?) and totally miss the big picture: really, we're all just people trying to be healthy!

i cast no judgement on anyone, no matter what they eat. instead, i see them as almost a "comrade" in this fight to live as best we can. i see us as one body of people trying to do the best we can with what we know to be true.

it's absolutely shameful how much the food industry keeps from us: details about slaughtering, chemical additives, and processing of our foods that can be detrimental, or at least impact our health. that's where our fight is.

if you feel guilty for still not being "perfect" in your diet, take heart! i'm certainly no better than anyone else, and there's no such thing as eating perfectly. life is about progress, not perfection. we're all in the same boat!

when i post on things i've learned or my point of view, it doesn't mean i'm criticizing someone who doesn't eat that way - it's the only way i know how to get the word out on things we all deserve to know.

up tomorrow?

how to decode food marketing, such as free-range, organic, natural, humane, etc.

thoughts? let's talk this out in the comments, y'all!

-rebekah

my life in food.

2010-08-24T06:19:00.000-04:00

good morning friends!

for those of you who started back at school yesterday, how was it?!? i start thursday, and am nervous as junk... it's been a while since i was in school!

source.

just wanted to give you guys a little transparency on my journey through food. i had been toying with the idea of posting on why i went animal-free for a few weeks now, but didn't. honestly, i was afraid to.

diet is so personal, especially when ethics are involved. i didn't, and still don't, want anyone to feel like i am judging them for whatever they eat, be it french fries, cake, lettuce, meat, or green smoothies. i don't see you as a better or worse human being because of what you eat.

i feel accountable for how my actions effect others and responsible for my own health, so i took my lifestyle in my own hands. this was my choice, and doesn't mean i know everything or think i am the ultimate authority. my only goal is to help someone else through my story... just so we're clear, ok?

this is an email i wrote to the beautiful ashley of nourishing the soul in response to learning patience through my food journey. enjoy!

..............................................................................................................................

hey beautiful - thanks for your comment! so glad you decided to stop by :)
about going vegan - it's really been an interesting evolution for me. i grew up a normal american teenager - chips, hot dogs, mac n cheese, etc. it wasn't until i watched my mom battle with breast cancer that i started to realize my lifestyle DOES effect me!

since then, i haven't really stopped researching health, nutrition, and wellness. i am completely convinced of the ties between what we consume and our health. health is more than food, but food is a HUGE factor, for sure. i started to struggle with what i now know is fibromyalgia since late 2006, and during that struggle for answers, i started to realize my food not only effects my health for the long term, but how i live/feel day to day.

i've since realized that i could ease many of my fibro symptoms by changing my diet - praise god! at the same time, i began to uncover many things about the animal-product industry i wasn't thrilled about, to say the least. i spent a lot of time (about 2 years) researching the industry because i knew if i changed something so dramatic, it would need to be for a DARN good reason. i'm an all or nothing sorta chick, i guess. i went vegetarian in march of '10.

after going vegetarian, i slipped into the habit of getting most of my calories from cheese and greek yogurt... not a terrible habit unless you LIVE on them as i did at almost every meal. i realized i was getting more animal products eating vegetarian than i was as an omnivore! and i don't know about you, but i don't dig hormones and antibiotics in my chow. i also started to see more exaggerated symptoms of issues i was only mildly concerned about when i was eating meat - eggs seemed to make me queasy, and dairy always left me a " brain fog." i started to pay more attention to what i ate, getting more in tune with my body, and realized i felt much better eating mostly plants - veggies, lots of fruits, some grains, etc.

once again, i started reading. i decided to inform myself with books/medical studies on the dairy industry, and everything seemed to fall into place. after what i had discovered, i couldn't eat animal products again, for myself or for the world we live in. i mourned the "loss" of my beloved greek yogurt, sure, but after a few days of feeling better, i knew it would never be worth it again... i mean, for the first time in years, i had found something i could ACTUALLY HELP my health with! cheesy, yes, but i was frustrated to tears almost daily for years.

my transition to veganism was health-driven FIRST, and backed up by my complete disdain for the dollar-driven practices exercised by the poultry/dairy/egg industry. i am not a meat-hating, tree-hugging, natural born animal-lover, but i absolutely detest abuse, torture, and unnecessary displays of aggression (towards humans or otherwise), so i felt like it was a no-brainer.

i've had my share of struggles along the way, sure. there are many facets of health, and sorting through all the trendy diets has been challenging. i've dabbled a bit with the raw foods and macro movements, but for the most part, i just eat simple, natural foods and don't label myself. i don't think there's anything shocking that an orange is healthy - so i eat it! i don't care if you call it raw, magic, superfood, or crazy... it's just food to me. god made it, i eat it. awesome.

since my transition, i am managing my fibromyalgia pain better than i could have ever imagined. it's still a daily struggle for sure, but i'm seeing pain i've lived with for years finally show a sign of change! i also have found a few surprises along the way... better skin and nails? way fewer headaches? YES PLEASE! i won't say it's effortless, but when something is so crucial to your health and others, it's an easy decision. i also am realizing how ignorant i am about the products i mindlessly use - i mean, windex is tested in rabbits eyes? seriously? how is that completely necessary to see if it cleans windows?

i am not the gold standard of diet, and i don't know all the answers. i won't tell anyone what to do or judge them, but i would encourage everyone to at least research what they're eating and examine their own diets - are they treating their bodies the way they deserve to be treated? if i had been all along, who knows how my health would have looked, or what i would or wouldn't be dealing with right now. all i can say is use your brains, and remember: you are worth the best, and what you do effects yourself and others!

thanks for asking, girl. i hope this helps shed a bit of light into my crazy life! :) if you have any more questions, criticisms, or whatever, please feel free to email me!
.......................................................................................................

thanks for letting me share my story! i hope this brings some clarity to my choices concerning food. i've never come out and addressed it head on, but i don't want someone to misconstrue my intentions, either, so it was time.

let me be clear: this blog is not become a peta-thumping, meat-hating, veggie-ranting diary. i am who i am for many reasons, and my decisions at mealtime don't define all that i am. i would love to speak with anyone who wants to take charge of their own health, but i will never pester or badger anyone into changing their lives. my desire is to get you to think about your decisions (food, emotional, and otherwise), not guilt-trip you by eating out of fear.

some huge factors in my decision? earthlings, thrive, the athlete's plate, eating animals, the end of overeating, in defense of food, the china study, the kind diet, countless blogs (both pro- and anti-vegan), scientific research databases, and my own blood work, improving health, stomach, and taste buds!

all that said, mental health and emotional stability always come first. always. veganism is not a quick weight loss program (i've gained!), or a cute, trendy diet: it's a life-altering change! if you are struggling with emotional eating, fear foods, or self-abuse, please don't take on a food challenge just yet. take care of your heart first, ok? doing that will set you up for an amazing life, not just an amazing diet. you are more than what you eat!

also, veganism is NOT a magic bullet, or a cure-all of diseases. i've changed many things about my diet that aren't related to veganism, and am still a work in progress! i don't feel well eating sugar, MSG, fried foods, and am testing how i respond to gluten... so it's not like animals are evil: it's a process to sort through how food responds to YOUR body! and food doesn't heal all things: i still have fibro, i still struggle with body-image, i still have occasional stomach issues, and i still am HUMAN. food isn't magic, we just need to provide our bodies with the right things so food can do it's job: fuel us!

i believe two things: i eat as healthfully as possible because i deserve it, and i absolutely despise greed-based factory farming practices. beyond that, the rest is trial and error, my friends! let's eat up for our health :)

p.s. - if you haven't been over to ashley's blog, please do so! she is an honest, hilarious genius of a girl.

thoughts? questions? disagree? i'd love to hear all opinions, veg-head and omnis alike!
-rebekah

finally, recipes!

2010-08-23T17:05:00.000-04:00

hey hey fellas! happy monday!

i survived my 21st birthday. thank you all so much for your sweet comments! it was awesome to see new faces around here, too! hi to all my new friends (welcome!), and old friends - you guys make the world go round.

it was an absolutely wonderful day, although 18-year-old rebekah would have hung her head in shame...

i hung out with my amazing family, went for a barefoot run, napped, went to church, and hung out with an old friend. i did have a birthday sip of bourbon, and quickly remembered why my wild-child days are over... i was home by 11pm. apparently between 18 and 21, i turned into a little old grandma :)

i finally have recipes for you guys!

i've been pretty worn out the last few days, so not too much kitchen wizzardry going on here.

but i am still doing my gluten-free trial (still going strong!) and my celiac sister needs bread for school, so i got off my lazy butt to make that gluten-free sandwich bread i've been promising you all for years and years. yes, i'm irresponsible... wanna fight?

i can't believe i'm saying this... but i wrote this recipe! me! klutzy, klutzy me! i didn't have any of the ingredients called for in the recipe i was going to use, nor was it animal-free, so i winged it. it actually turned out really good!

here's my gf version of your classic whole wheat sandwich bread - soft, pliable, and a nice background to fillings, because let's be honest, sandwiches are really just vehicles for hummus, right?

gluten-free sandwich bread
makes one 9x5 loaf

1 1/2 cups warm water
1 packet (or 2 1/4 teaspoons) active yeast
drizzle of honey/sprinkle of sugar
6 tablespoons ground flaxseeds
3 tablespoons sweetener (i used a mixture of honey and blackstrap molassas, but agave is fine)
2 cups gluten-free flours, for structure (i used 1 cup teff, 1 cup brown rice)
1 cup gluten-free starch (i used tapioca)
1 1/2 teaspoon xanthan gum
1 1/2 teaspoon salt

let's get cookin:
1. proof your yeast: heat your water to where it's warm to the touch (about 110 degrees), stir in a little bit of honey (or sugar), and sprinkle your yeast over top. after 5 minutes, do you have bubbles? score.
2. stir in your flaxseeds and sweetener.
3. in a separate bowl (or your mixer), combine your flour, starch, xanthan gum, and salt. sift with a fork until ingredients are combined.
4. add your wet ingredients in with the dry, and mix until you get a ball of dough (highly technical). if it seems really dry and crumbly, add a few splashes of warm water and try again.
5. plop that bad boy into a WELL GREASED 9x5 pan and let it rise until doubled (about an hour). my mom taught me to put it in the microwave with a cup of boiling water next to it so it's nice and warm... but DO NOT forget it's there and use the microwave! eek!
6. preheat your oven to 350 degrees. once it's risen, stick it in and bake for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean. let it hang out on a cooling rack for 10 minutes still in the pan, then take it out and cool it on the rack until room temp. enjoy!

i also made homemade larabars.

i've made them before, but it's been a while... and these were better anyways. i wouldn't even call it a recipe, and so many people make them i i feel silly even writing it out for you.

if you're interested, i made some with dried figs, raisins, cashews, and brazil nuts. i'm trying to expand my nut repitoire because i'm sensitive to almonds and peanuts, so they were unique! but so, so good - like healthy fig newtons (my childhood obsession).

basically, just process your nuts into fine "sand," dump them in a bowl, and process your fruit into a sticky paste. add to the nuts, and moosh together. divide into balls, and taa-daa! just make sure you use a little bit more dried fruit than nuts so they stick together. i keep mine in a container in the fridge so they don't get funky, and just throw a few in a baggie when i run out the door.

that's all folks!

tomorrow i'm gonna post an email about why i went animal-free. i wrote it in response to a sweet blogger's comment, and thought it might explain a little more about who i am and why i choose to eat the way i do.

i know people are very opinionated about vegans, and understand if you aren't interested in reading my story. i would ask you approach it with an open mind, though, because it's kinda unique! i never thought i would eat this way, either. just a head's up!

have you guys made anything interesting recently?
have you ever "winged it" and written a recipe?
-rebekah

it's easy.

2010-08-22T06:51:00.000-04:00

i have plenty of reasons to celebrate today.

for 21 years, god has given me breath each and every morning.

i've lived through two decades of sunrises and sunsets, even though i've taken almost all of them for granted.

miraculously, i'm still kickin' it after 2 near-death car accidents, countless mistakes turned ugly, and many, many broken bones.

i'm loved like no one else i know.

i have powerful legs that take me wherever i need to go (and look alright in shorts!).

i've been given thousands more second chances than i deserve, and i haven't run out yet.

after not being able to leave my bed for weeks, i'm hot on the heels of a half-marathon.

i laugh, and mean it.

i'm headed back to school for a career i can't wait to get my hands in.

god never stops dropping opportunities into my lap, all i have to do is accept them.

i've been left breatheless at the grand canyon, mexican beaches, niagra falls, luray caverns, south beach, st. thomas, and probably more i've already forgotten.

i never have to look far for a reason to smile.

i am constantly thrilled and shocked by the incredible people that flood my life: YOU!

food tastes good. real good.

no more X's of shame at a concert (shameful only because i end up crossing my arms and wiping sharpie all over my boobs...).

the older i get, the more i discover i've had the most incredible friend all along: my mother.

i can't wait for the next 21 years... what's next, god?

patience through the process.

2010-08-20T16:21:00.000-04:00

hello? anyone still out there?

if you're here reading after the last... um, interesting 48 hours, hey! i'm glad you're here!

source.

gf update: i'm on my third day and feelin good! gf is pretty easy for me because of my little sister's celiac, but i did sorta sigh when mom pulled out homemade whole wheat bread from the freezer today.

i'm making a new recipe for gf teff bread this weekend, so keep your eyes peeled! i'll probably get off my lazy butt and make wraps too, but don't hold your breath :)

and tonight, i get an awesome early birthday present of going to dinner with brittany of eatingbirdfood! we're getting sushi to celebrate my 21st birthday (on the 22nd)... yes blogworld, i will finally legally be able to buy Kahlua for making desserts! i see an obsession building.

..............................................

just a quick thought for today...

how many of us have decided on a whim to change something in our lives, only to end up failing, feeling guilty and defeated?

we plot to overhaul things like our diet, exercise habits, or organization with a spur of the moment decision. we put our heads down, work crazy-hard for a week, then run out of steam, finally caving in. we kick ourselves, feel worthless, and vow to do better next week. sound familiar?

this seems pretty frequent around new years, not to call anyone out... :)

but why does this cycle keep happening? after thousands of failed "i'll start on monday" diets in my teens, you would think i would have conquered this mindset, right? i realized when i transitioned to eating animal-free that i might not be as tough as i thought i was!

i was totally taken off-guard when i struggled at first with my new lifestyle. i just didn't get it: i am fearless! i have willpower out the wazoo! i am a nutritional solid rock! i'm laughing now because it's so ridiculous i felt this way, but really, i did!

i'm not sure why i was shocked - it's a HUGE change! but yet, to say i was shocked would be an understatement. once i woke up, chilled out, and started loving myself, i realized two things:

lifestyle changes aren't about willpower, and we approach them all wrong!

source.

i think it's important to ask yourself why you're approaching such a dramatic change. are you unhappy with who you are? are you missing something? are you empty? why?

"i need to lose weight" doesn't count. why do you need to lose weight? "i need to exercise more" is good, but what's your goal? "i should go vegan" is pointless... because why?

this is not the place to shrug off the tough questions. dig deep! let your mind wander, and be honest with yourself. change shouldn't be for someone else, from pressure, or out of anger. if you don't really know why you're doing this, it can't be that important to you.

without an answer, you have no real motivation. if your motive don't come from the heart, you won't be successful in the long haul - change requires too much effort without solid convictions!

you don't need "willpower" - you need a reason to persevere. after about two years of soul-searching, i finally had my answers... do you? if not, it's ok! just keep looking.

it's also really important to cut yourself some slack, darnit!

source.

lifestyles changes are a HUGE deal - you're overhauling yourself! we beat ourselves up with so much guilt over "failure" in our diets, relationships, and careers for no reason... so stop it!

if you were to just up and move to a foreign country, you would be more realistic. you would realize adjusting to the culture, language, and schedule takes time, and isn't a simple transition. you'd be more sympathetic, right?

apply this same logic to a transition you've made, or are thinking about making, in your own life. love yourself through the process, and accept that big changes means big challenges. don't let yourself slip into negative self-talk - you're a work in progress!

i should have known that it would take me some time to adjust, but i was almost guilty about the struggles i encountered. i expected easy, instant results - i wanted success, and i wanted it now!

don't do what i did: expect instant gratification.

source.

any serious change will take time, and that's totally ok - it's not a race, silly! if it's truly worth it, transitioning at your own pace is the way to go. just because you aren't flowing seamlessly after 15 seconds doesn't mean you're a failure!

i doubted myself, second-guessed myself, and thought about going back 10,000 times. but continuing to work through a transition means you're making progress. don't give up just because you have second thoughts! that's the hard part... and when motivation is totally key. you see what you're made of during the doubt, you know?

growing as people is a life-long process. we have successes, we have failures... this is normal! just keep getting back up again, and eventually, your new life will become second nature to you. if not, you know it wasn't right in the first place, and problem solved!

have you beat yourself up about a failed "resolution?"
have you made it through adapting to a new change?
-rebekah

thank you!

2010-08-19T18:34:00.000-04:00

hey guys - i know i've posted a ton in the last 24 hours, but just wanted to clarify one more thing.

i have no issues WHATSOEVER with the premise behind the HLS. i think it's awesome, and i totally support the idea that the organizers were going for.

i also get the fact that it requires a lot of money! i can't even imagine how expensive it was.

my ONLY issue is what seems to be happening to food blogging... the negatives you guys commented about. i think many people are confused, feeling guilty, or deceived, and unfortunately, i feel like the Summit was the culmination of those issues.

i read the agenda, the prep work, and the after-posts - and i'm still saying i didn't go, so i'm not going to judge. it's not my place, or my purpose to criticize.

my intention was to raise awareness that a requirement of health is using your OWN mind.

i am thrilled the Summit encouraged bloggers to be healthier. that makes me crazy-happy! i just was making a point that it's not the whole picture, and it's worth thinking about.

and i get frito-lay has more money than smaller companies... but continuing to show support of big businesses who do NOT promote health doesn't encourage smaller companies to thrive.

just my thoughts. and i promise that's my last post about it :)

thank you SO MUCH to every single person who read and commented - i appreciate all of your opinions and you taking the time to share your thoughts!

the whole point of this was to generate awareness and conversation. thank you so much for joining me!
-rebekah

what is healthy?

2010-08-19T05:25:00.000-04:00

good morning!

i was blown away by all your wonderful comments on my thoughts about the HLS! thank you so much to each and every one of you who took the time to voice your opinion! i read every comment very interested to hear your opinions.

i guess if i'm going to challenge that the HLS may not be healthy, i should have given you my opinion on what IS healthy, shouldn't i?

my big beef with the HLS is not the Summit itself, but how it is perceived. food blogging has turned into this vortex people get sucked in to, and before we realize it, our view of "normal health" is training for a marathon, getting our RD, and eating oatmeal.

there's nothing wrong with those things! they just don't guarantee health, and they are certainly not the only way to get there. it bugs me how food blogging can be a trend/clique, like high school almost, and everyone accepts what a big blogger does as the gold standard of vitality.

if you went - i hope you had an amazing time! i would love to meet many of the lovely people who attended, and i do read some of their blogs, for sure! but most of them i view as entertainment or cooking information, not health advice. just because you take pictures everyday doesn't make you healthy, just like how researching nutrition daily doesn't make me a expert (darn it!).

i realize the Summit is about the community - and that's what it should be about. a group of bloggers hanging out and enjoying life together. if that was all everyone viewed it as, i wouldn't be bugged. but people assume it's more than that, like some holy grail of healthiness, and that's why i didn't want to go. i think there's a lot more to health than that - no criticism if you enjoyed it!

so what is health?

i didn't give my definition for two reasons: one, it's darn near impossible to outline, and two, what i have to say isn't easy to swallow.

it's difficult to define health because we all live different lives. what one person needs can be far different than their mom, brother, etc., and it constantly morphs over the years. health is individual and personal.

for some, running is a great path to health - exercise is certainly crucial to life! for others, though, running can be turned into a whip we use to beat our weight into submission, and that's not health. and true, losing weight could save some lives, but there's also nothing healthy about the diet mentality of starving/cheat days/protein overload. depending on who you are, health will take on a different appearance than someone else - and that's ok!

it might seem a bit radical, but go with me here - as a nation, we don't really want health. we want an excuse to keep doing what we're doing, and someone to consider us "healthy" so we feel good about ourselves. we want sympathy.

in all honesty, we're all so jaded we don't know what true health looks like! we live in a world where video games are considered exercise, half our food budget is spent on eating out, and most of us are obese. in today's america, you can't attain health without a lifestyle overhaul.

i know our battle cry is "everything in moderation!," but since when did chemical preservatives, chocolate binges, daily starbucks runs, and making ourselves sick with greasy pizza become moderate? if moderation were truly all we needed, things like Food, Inc. and Supersize Me! wouldn't be shocking... those aren't examples of extreme living anymore - they're pretty moderate for most americans.

any way you slice it, moderation still includes things we desperately don't need for health. it's still a steady flow of junk. moderate amounts of gum still supplies you with a steady flow of chemicals, moderate amounts of unorganic produce still exposes you to hundreds of unnatural pesticides each day, and moderate amounts of dairy blasts you with added hormones.

think about it this way: would you smoke moderately? drive without a seatbelt moderately? take drugs moderately? the only reason we don't do those things in moderation is because we accept they are dangerous as a nation... and we won't accept we might have to change our eating habits, so we keep exercising "moderation." i'm pretty sure other cultures have been practicing true moderation for thousands of years, so who's has their perspective on health mixed up: them, or us?

i'm not criticizing anyone - truly, because i've been a slob most of my life! no judgement here. but i am tired of hearing doctors say all these new diseases are just a part of life and we have to medicate and deal with it. no, they're a part of THIS GENERATION. we did this to ourselves, and i'm not ready to accept that.

i want my life back! i'm not ok with accepting half the world will die of obesity-induced diabetes, or i'll lose my sisters to heart disease at 60. i'm not ok with accepting things like fibromyalgia, cancer, and autism are just a "freak occurances." NO NO NO! that is not health - but certainly a moderate amount of americans have them!

i know what you're thinking - eating healthy is not all life is about. i'm a college kid - i know sometimes, wendy's really is the only option, and chocolate cake is good! i get that totally! but if there's something in my life i know i can change for the better... why wouldn't i? i'd much rather put the time into choosing good food now than dealing with the emotional blow of cancer later in life. does that make me extreme?

i'm not telling you to live in a bubble, never go out to eat, or go vegan (but you should!). i'm begging you to PURSUE HEALTH - because in this generation, health is almost extinct.

so how to define health? i can't tell you exactly. you can't identify health just by what you DO. it encompasses your whole existance - your emotions, your mental stability, your stress level, your fitness level, your risk for disease, your quality of life. it's WHO you are, not WHAT you are.

if you're interested in what i DO or believe specifically, check out my passions page, or shoot me an email! i'd love to share what has worked for me - i can get out of bed now because of it! but truly, only you truly know if how you are living is supporting yourself do everything you want to do.

i want more - do you?

beach recap, and no HLS for me.

2010-08-18T21:08:00.000-04:00

i'm back home!

it seems almost weird that i'm excited to be back from the beach, but there is something so restful about familiar surroundings/the daily grind.

aaaaaaaand i know i said i had pictures, but as i was loading them, my ~~piece of crap~~ lovely computer froze, crashed, and deleted them. all of them.

sweet, IBM. i appreciate it.

anyways, the beach was beautiful (i promise!), and i had a wonderful time relaxing and being lazy with my family. there was plenty of veggie pizza, walks on the beach, and crazy-long naps... what more could you ask for in a vacation?

moving on.

just wanted to challenge you guys with my opinion on the Healthy Living Summit.

as a little disclaimer: i have no ill feelings towards the bloggers who attended, sponsored, or spoke in chicago. live and let live, you know? i just haven't heard anyone voice this side of the issue, so i'm steppin' up!

if you're a bit lost, the HLS is basically a convention for food bloggers. you attend lectures on photography, weight lifting, and ethical eating, run with fellow foodies, and of course, eat good meals!

i think this is wonderful, really. i have no problems with the idea of it. so why didn't i want to go, then?

because food blogging does not equal healthy living.

i'm sure that all the bloggers who attended would consider themselves "healthy," and they very well may be - i won't judge them. but what bugs me is the attitude we all seem to have acquired of "hey, i blog daily pictures of my oatmeal! how can i not be the example of health?"

but let's get real... since when does taking a picture of your food mean you're healthy?

honestly, food blogging is a hobby. it's not an exclusive club, a clique, or a badge of honor. it's something we do for fun... like building model airplanes, yodeling, or playing checkers.

can it be entertaining (like yodeling)? YES! but does it mean you're healthy? NO!

i understand the point of the HLS is to promote healthy blogging, and that's awesome! but the focus still is still on blogging... and blogging is a hobby. it's a blogging conference.

i guess my point is - if you didn't go, it doesn't mean you aren't healthy enough, good enough, or cool enough. food pictures don't make you a superhero. let's adjust our focus on food blogging, ok?

for the love of sweet potato fries, please don't take "health" at face value.

if anything claims to be "healthy," be it a conference, a loaf of bread, or a diet book, do yourself a favor and ask "WHAT IS IT MADE OF??? "

people's definition of health varies... and businesses will do anything to convince you their products are good for you. it's their ONLY mission to trick you so they make cash.

i urge you to always dig deeper. look past the marketing, labels, and trends, and investigate things to the core. is it healthy? please find out for yourself.

(i'm not naming names, but consider looking up the ingredients in the sponsor's products... HFCS, dough conditioners, tons of saturated fat, and sodium overload is not exactly health food.)

it's shameful how often people are lead astray when all they want is to be healthier! i'm not telling you the HLS is bad because i didn't go - i'm just asking you, next time something like this pops up, stop and think about what it REALLY is about... health, or trendy hobby/false marketing?

your thoughts?
did you go?
-rebekah

back to reality...

2010-08-17T20:54:00.000-04:00

hey friends -

i am heading home from the beach tomorrow morning... it's been a gorgeous, relaxing, and wonderful two days, but i'm so ready to get back home!

either tomorrow or thursday, i'll post some incredible sunset pictures and give you guys my thoughts on why i didn't want to go to the Healthy Living Summit - stay tuned!

PS - GF angels, i start my gluten-free test run tomorrow, so expect plenty of complaining and recipes coming your way :)

thank you all for your sweet comments and tweets while i've been away!
-rebekah

checking in!

2010-08-15T14:32:00.000-04:00

hey guys! happy weekend to ya!

just wanted to let all my gluten-free angels know i haven't forgotten about you! i know i said i was working on some gf wraps/flatbreads/tortillas, and i still am! i promise!

i've been running around like a crazy person, making my little sister's birthday cake and getting ready for my little family vacation. i will be baking gf bread, wraps, and granola bars soon!

and for those of you who have been hanging with me for a while (XXOO!), you might have remembered me thinking about doing a gluten-free trail. wellllllll, i finally decided to just do it. after cutting out other things i know make me sick, i'm still questioning gluten, so we'll see! i start wednesday.

thanks for being patient with me. does anyone have any recipes i should try?
-rebekah

how to work out effectively.

2010-08-13T07:25:00.001-04:00

hey there friday people! how is everyone?

this weekend's going to be a little busy for me - lunch at whole foods today with mom and my little sister for her birthday (she'll be 19! i'm so old!), then going shopping for her "back to school" clothes.

tomorrow i'm making her birthday request: a gluten-free, cookies and cream ice cream cake. wish me luck! and her birthday dinner is that night.

sunday i have church and lunch with the girls in the family and a few friends, then i'll probably collapse!

you guys doing anything fun?

source.

ok, so today i want to explain how to plan efficient gym workouts.

we all know we need some strength training in our life. it strengthens our bones, prevents injuries, and tones our bodies (bonus!). it also keeps us young and makes us better runners/swimmers/yogis.

but i hear all the time "i don't know how to lift weights!" or "it takes way too long!," and i understand why you feel that way! the gym can be intimidating and a huge time-suck if you let it.

so we need a game plan.

y'all, honestly, i hate to be at the gym for more than an hour. i think it's pointless, boring, and who has time for that? so i plan my workouts to be quick and dirty, fast and efficient. i get more done in my speedy session that i used to in hours!

how? keep it simple.

i'm not a doctor, but my advice? no one needs to spend hours wandering around using every single machine! we aren't bodybuilders - just regular people trying to be healthy and strong.

source.

things to remember:

1. focus on technique and effort -
this is the most important part. as someone who worked in the gym and dated a personal trainer, i can't stress this enough! and i don't mean to be rude, but if you aren't willing to commit to doing it right, please don't do it at all. irresponsible, incorrect form can cause injuries that take years to get over.

the positive side of taking your time? you don't have to lift huge weights to see results. the best progress will come from you taking your time, focusing on what you're doing, and giving your best effort on every single rep. slow down and get it right the first time!

if you're a member of a gym, i would highly recommend asking a trainer or staff member to watch your technique from time to time. don't be intimidated - they want you to be safe, and you look way less clueless that way.

2. engage your entire body -

this is how you get in and out quick! it's like multitasking for your body: the more muscles you engage at a time, the quicker you tone up. start incorporating exercises that use multiple muscle groups at once, like lunges, planks, and lateral raises.

i know the circuit machines are convenient and less scary, but you don't go to the gym to sit down! get up off your hiney and hit the free weight section - you don't get a toned body from a workout in an easy chair. it's not the "guy's area," it's just where the weights are... but notice: mostly guys use it, and mostly the guys are toned... hmm.

new to weights/need the basics explained? try this workout!

3. learn to love supersets!
this is what changed my body composition the most! a superset is when you do strength exercises back-to-back, instead of doing a set, resting, then doing another set.

for example, i usually do a pattern like this: a set of arm exercises, a set of ab exercises, and a set of leg exercises. as soon as i finish the arm exercises, i go right into the abs with no rest, then right into the legs with no rest. after legs, i'll grab some water and chill for 30 seconds or so, then i go right back into the arms. see? a superset!

the benefit? it keeps my heart rate up, my muscles warm, and is lightning fast! you sneak some heart-strengthening cardio into your weight routine, pump up your muscles, and you're done in no time. and if you're like me, you need something where you don't get *yawn* bored.

my workout schedule?

i'll be honest - i don't spend a lot of time working out. i love being active, but i just don't have the energy for it like i used to. so you can imagine how surprised i was when my body began transforming to the strongest and healthiest i've ever been... as i did less and less!

i'm not saying you should be lazy. hear me out - being active is a huge priority in my life. i used to believe i had to do hours of cardio to fit in my jeans, and i definitely over-trained. these days, i'm committed and consistent, but please realize you don't need to slave away at the treadmill to be fit.

my week almost always consists of 2 weight workouts, 1 cardio interval workout, 1 endurance workout, and a yoga day. that's it! i warm up and cool down a few minutes before and after weights, my intervals are a 30-min treadmill deal, and my endurance workout is usually a long pool swim. i do yoga for a few minutes most days a week because it feels good, but i also try to dedicate one weekly workout to yoga to challenge myself.

source.

the bottom line?

you DO NOT need to do cardio endlessly. it doesn't really build muscle or boost your metabolism. what your body needs is to be challenged, then rested. if you want to change your body and how you feel, hit up those weights, ladies and gentlemen!

a workout can only be effective if you're consistent and actually enjoy doing it. and no, you don't need to workout every single day! that's ridiculous. you get the most results when you let your body rest and rebuild! don't pack so much exercise into your life that you hate doing it and give up. this isn't a race - it's a lifestyle for your health!

have any workout tips to share? favorite exercises? stories?
-rebekah

no such thing as a free lunch...

2010-08-11T21:37:00.000-04:00

hey friends!

um... can i give a quick shoutout to all the awesome responses on monday's body torture post?

i hate how natural it is for self-hate to slip out. but let's do what we can to stop it, ok? i don't want our daughters and sons to grow up thinking they need to beat their bodies into submission to wear a size 2/8/12/20 or run 10 miles. deal?

i'm a tired puppy today - i did a swim workout this morning with a friend, who just so happens to be training for a half-ironman triathalon!

i probably should have considered that fact before the workout, but i am so proud i did it! he kicked my butt! don't feel too bad for me, though - he's pretty darn sexy :)

ahem. movin' right along!

i have a feeling some people might not like my thoughts today.

you know those diet articles that tell you the few, measly calories you're allowed, then list the "free food" you can have in addition? the food that doesn't count or doesn't matter?

there is no such thing as a free food.

i know it sucks, but you can't eat endless amounts of anything. no, seriously - nothing.

i don't care what you've read, what calorie count you know, or what your friend did to lose 10 pounds. it's not healthy, and it doesn't solve anything.

thinking you can eat something "free" causes problems. there are usually two reasons we rely on a guilt-free food: we're dieting and emotionally eating.

diets suck, first of all... but that's another post.

look, sometimes we do crazy things to lose weight... like believing we can eat without consequence. this would be great, except there's no such thing as a calorie-free food. other than water.

there are plenty of foods naturally low in calories like carrots, melon, raspberries, etc, but these things do have calories. when we think something is "free," we tend to go all out and pack away a fair amount... which kinda defeats the purpose of low-calorie, right?

let's just make one thing clear: gnawing on celery or sugar-free jello isn't going to give you an awesome bikini body. and don't even get me started on those no-cal noodles!

you're just going to be unsatisfied, still hungry, and move on to something else. probably a lot of somethings. and all those little bites you keep taking of "free food" along the way will just add up and keep you farther from your goals.

do you just feel like eating?

sometimes, we aren't hungry, but we still want a little something. we just need to be munching.

we feel like we've eaten enough already, so we search for consequence-free snacks. we want them on our tongue, but not our hips.

the problem? we aren't dealing with why we're munching. until we ask ourselves the hard questions, we won't be able to conquer the snack habit (like my gum chewing addiction).

we eat for all sorts of reasons: boredom, stress, loneliness, sadness... but there isn't enough food in the world to fix those problems. you have to deal with the heart before you can stay out of the kitchen. and no amount of grapes can do that for you.

whether you're trying to lose weight or try to cope, don't deprive yourself.

source.

if you're toning up (or anytime!), eating real, natural foods is the way to go. you don't need diet food - you deserve healthy food! eat a snack that will satisfy you and encourage you to stick with your new, healthier lifestyle.

if you're emotional, put the snack down and let yourself deal. haven't you been carrying that burden long enough? how many carrots/cookies will it take before you're ready?

something else to consider:

i am definitely a believer that food brings quality of life. what would a day be without a juicy, ripe apple, or a piece of dark chocolate?

but everything you eat should matter to you. it's super easy to tack on something here or there and not even notice you're eating it, but why do that? if you don't love it or it doesn't do something for your health, do you really want to mindlessly consume it?

source.

do you mindlessly...:

- dump creamer in your coffee?

- snack on fruit all day long?

- take bites off other peoples' plates?

- pop breath mints?

- eat in front of the computer?

- grab a few handfuls from the candy bowl?

for example, it totally took me by surprise to learn just how much creamer i actually used to use! for as much as i dumped in, i could have had a bowl of ben & jerry's. i didn't even notice the creamer! after i saw that, i felt cheated, wanted some ben & jerry's, and switched to drinking coffee black.

if creamer rocks your boat, then by all means, keep it up! just own up to it.

it frustrates me so much when people say they can't lose weight or barely eat anything, but they totally overlook their daily starbucks habit or the cookies they gobbled at the office copier. if those things make you happy, then do them, but most of us do them without realizing it... and we don't really even like them that much. think when you eat!

let's get real.

source.

it's just a snack, i know, but when i can't turn on the TV or walk in the grocery store without being attacked by all this diet crap, i get frustrated.

if it's calorie-free, what's the point? food has calories for a reason - it gives us energy and delivers vital nutrients to our bodies. no-cal food is just... chemically-infused air. it does nothing for you except support a bad habit and a bad body-image.

i deserve good food, darn it! and you do, too. let's stop focusing on what we shouldn't be eating and start focusing on what we really want - healthy, strong bodies and happy, long lives. don't they require healthy fuel?

your thoughts?

-rebekah

just say no.

2010-08-09T18:12:00.001-04:00

i'm pretty wound up, so if i seem tense... i am!

last night i made a quick stop into trader joe's for some apples and nuts. standard occurance.

i always chat with my cashier to (hopefully!) brighten their day up a bit, and my lady yesterday was actually really friendly! she asked what i did last weekend, and i told her not a lot since i had the stomach flu.

she stopped and laughed, pointing out my first outing after the stomach flu was the grocery store, to which i very enthusiastically informed her i mean business when it comes to food!

then she said something that kinda offended me... she said she loves getting the stomach flu because she always loses 5 pounds. say what? since when is puking a good thing?

i thought about what she said the whole drive home (didn't the same thing happen in the devil wears prada, too?), and have continued to stew for the last 24 hours. i'm mad. and i've come to this conclusion:

we accept torture as a normal way to treat our bodies.

seriously, when did it become logical or healthy to get excited over starving/puking/dehydrating off 5 pounds? that's not normal: that's torture.

but we grow up accepting it takes drastic measures to be beautiful. anything goes to get to your goal weight. and everyone knows celebs starve to stay slim.

other ways we torture ourselves? living our whole lives feeling nowhere near thin enough. squeezing into too-small clothes because we we're fat and "deserve" the punishment. comparing our beautiful, real bodies to fake photoshopped ones. letting others fat-talk and influence us negatively. focusing more on our cellulite than other people.

how sad is it that i can relate to all of those!?! and i doubt i'm alone in that. since when did we start accepting this as a part of life? i think i heard the average girl starts dieting is age 8... WTF?!?

source.

a noteworthy side of torture most people miss? the flip-side of acceptance.

anytime we don't respect our bodies, i'd call it torture. the main way we disrespect ourselves, i believe, is through our emotions.

but we can disrespect our bodies by neglecting them, too. sometimes we can get so caught up in rah-rah operation beautiful girl power that we forget to safeguard our health.

i'm a huge fan of self-acceptance and operation beautiful, obviously, but i am also incredibly passionate about living a healthy lifestyle. learning (and practicing!) nutrition and moving my body rocks my world! and it should rock yours, too.

and actually, i don't think you can say you are loving yourself if you don't take care of yourself. there. i said it! starving yourself to get to your goal weight clearly isn't self-love, but stuffing your face full of cake in celebration of your curves isn't either.

am i making any sense? where did our last shred of peace with ourselves go? where is our healthy balance? and why do we keep accepting this as the way life is?

i don't really don't have much to say other than this: please, please, please start training yourself to identify disordered thoughts like these: all of them.

no, you are NOT as big as a house. no, feminism does NOT give you a free pass to obesity. no, you do NOT need to work out for the 8th day in a row. no, you should NOT skip your own birthday party to aviod the cake. no, stuffing your face because you accept your size is NOT healthy. and NO NO NO you should NOT be excited about the stomach flu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gahh! any thoughts?

-r

lessons in matrimony.

2010-08-07T13:59:00.001-04:00

happy saturday, bloggies!

well, i survived the end of the week! after thinking for 3 days i was going through animal-free detox symptoms, i realized, in fact... i had the stomach flu. duh.

but the upside is if you're considering going vegan, don't let my silliness fool you! you'll be fine, and i do plan on writing a post about that soon :)

source.

also, i think i was a mostly successful bridesmaid yesterday (didn't trip walking down the isle!), but absolutely bawled my eyes out watching my freshman roommate get hitched. she was absolutely gorgeous - i'll snag some of pictures and post a few when she gets back from the honeymoon!

the reception was beautiful, too. outside and it didn't rain! i did realize something, though, that i thought was worth sharing. inspiration in the most unlikely of places, yes?

here's the deal - i was one of the only single people attending over the age of 10. and i think the 10-year-old had a girlfriend, actually.

a few years ago (ok, maybe more recently than that!), i would have been all kinds of embarrassed! i mean honestly, what's worse than being at a wedding by yourself, single, and not knowing a soul? weddings can be bad enough anyways.... i'm just sayin'.

picture this: i walk into the reception, all dolled up, put on my best smile, and gave positive, open body language. i'm not exactly an ogre, and i certainly have people skills... yet almost no one talked to me.

the younger me would definitely have taken this personally: am i not pretty enough to attract attention? do i look disinterested? am i not friendly enough? why does no one like me?

it might be glaringly obvious to you, but until recently, i was completely unaware i lacked confidence. you see, i thought i was a confident person! i had friends, i played sports, i even had a boyfriend most of my younger years! i thought i was doin' ok in that area.

but confidence is not how you respond to others. it's being at peace with who you are.

when other people were around, i could fake a smile, crack a joke, and dish out the compliments. but when i was alone, i couldn't hide that i hated myself. i hated my body, my skin, my dorky personality, my strict christian background, my clothes, my grades, my voice... yada yada yada.

i thought i gave off "happy vibes," but i couldn't shortcut self-love. until i was ready to cut the crap and embrace who i was, no one else could break down that barrier around my heart.

it's obviously much easier said than done - in today's world, we're pretty much taught from birth we're not good enough... because you can't be pretty without photoshop, botox, and gucci, right?

but at some point, you'll start to realize how empty false exteriors are. you can have the most expensive clothes ever made, but if you aren't at peace with the body underneath them, they're just pieces of fabric.

i could preach until i die that you are beautifully unique, but you've already heard that 109830843 times. instead, i want you do dig down and look at yourself - the most pure, naked, honest you. what do you love about yourself? what are you proud of? what makes you who you are?

make peace with those things. they are you. get to know your truly awesome self!

and the things you don't like? well, let's work on those. we are people in progress, and no one is judging you for not being 100% together at the ripe, old age of 25. it's not like they're perfect either!

the truth is, we all have issues. i don't think i'd be very comfortable around someone who didn't! but what impression do you want people to remember you for - that you hate your thighs, or that you have the most beautiful smile? that you're uncomfortable with your laugh, or that you're absolutely hilarious? if you focus on the things you love, others will be drawn to those things.

the battle here is won or lost in our own minds. if we dwell on the negative, we totally shut down our ability to shine. no one has the opportunity to experience who we really are, and that's a shame!

so last night, i met new people. i rocked my 4-inch-tall bridesmaid heels. i laughed at the ridiculously terrible toasts. i shamelessly flirted with bride's older brother (also single!).

what i didn't do? question why i was single. feel embarrassed. second-guess myself. think i wasn't good enough.

because i know who i am. i know my strengths and weaknesses. i know my purpose.

if you love yourself, you wouldn't treat yourself any other way. so going solo to a wedding? no big thing.

what are you confident about?
what could you love about yourself more?
-rebekah

recipe: whole wheat tortillas.

2010-08-05T17:49:00.000-04:00

hey buddies. happy almost friday!

i've spent the majority of the day today getting through some lovely detox/side effects of going animal-free, plus sleep deprivation. once again, i've been a blob.

so naturally, what do i do when i'm nauseous and grumpy?

homemade whole wheat tortillas

adapted from the homesick texan

1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour, spooned and leveled

1/2 cup white flour (i'm experimenting next with all whole wheat... stay tuned)

1 1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

2 teaspoons olive oil

1 cup warm non-dairy milk (i used trader joe's whole grain drink)

the how to:

mix together your dry ingredients. get your milk warm to the touch, but not scalding. slowly combine the two, mixing into a loose blob (i'm so technical, yes?).

kneed on a floured surface for a few minutes until you get a nice ball of dough. plop it into a bowl, cover with a damp towel, and let it hang out for 15 or 20 minutes.

cut your blob into 8 equal pieces (i made 16 small) and roll into balls. sit on your floured counter (not touching!) and cover with the damp towel. let it chill there for 10 more minutes.

heat up a stainless skillet (or cast-iron, if you have the patience) to medium-high heat. with a rolling pin, roll your balls from the center on the floured counter until even and very thin. keep covered with towel while you cook. add more flour to the counter and pin when things get sticky.

slap one in the dry skillet for about a minute, then flip and cook for about 30 more seconds until you get those cute little burnt bubble-marks. stack them on a plate and keep covered until you eat!

to freeze, stack them with wax paper/parchment between them and pop them in a ziplock.

optional: you could add in 1/4 cup flax, herbs, cumin + garlic powder, or switch out the 1/2 c white flour with rice or spelt flour.

eat up! and for my GF sweeties, i have a few tortilla recipes already picked out and waiting. i've made them before, but it's been a while - i'm tackling them next week!

the bright side.

2010-08-04T18:01:00.000-04:00

hey friends -

i have no brain power today because i have gotten into my "insomnia funk" again. no excuses, but 2:30am was a loooooooong time ago.

today's challenge for y'll:

there is always a positive in every situation.

if you can't see the positive, check your perception!

it is there; it's just not what you think it should look like, or what you expected to happen. but every situation happens for a reason, has a bright side, and you can learn from it. every single one.

the challenge in my own life?

insomnia sucks. you can't really deny the fact... especially when you don't have anything to be up for (hello unemployment!).

the positive? i have gotten so much done today!

i've had the time to research a few things for a friend, bake, spend time with my mom, read a few books, learn new things, and pray for some wonderful people in my life.

another positive? tonight, i get to try again! i am so blessed to have a cozy, warm bed to try it over again. it could be so, so much worse.

what are you challenged to see the bright side in?

-rebekah

is comparing yourself to others a good thing?

2010-08-03T20:27:00.000-04:00

hey hey buddies. it's tuesday, jess!

i had a bombtastic day today. i acted like a blob all morning, read a little, went out to lunch with christie from honoring health (again! love her!), and knocked out a killer strength training workout.

yep. all in a days work :)

just a quick thought for you all tonight... i was reading some older posts from two awesome blogs and came across posts about how many calories they consume.

usually, i'm not really into other people's diets, but that day it struck a chord with me. i guess i was blown away by how active these girls are, and how little calories they actually ate (compared to me).

my first reaction was intrigue. they are both so healthy, and their diets really seem flawless! i'm amazed at their endless creativity and dedication to health.

... but then, i started internalizing. you know, comparing myself.

i started thinking about how beautiful and active these girls are, and how i move so much less, but eat so much more! it blew my mind.

i wouldn't say it made me uncomfortable, but i definitely had a few moments of uncertainty. how could this be? am i eating the right amount? am i overeating?

i quickly came to a shocking conclusion: i am not either of them.

brilliant, i know. the important fact i lost sight of was that we are all unique. what's good for me may not be good for you, or anyone else for that matter. we are individuals, and we require different things to feel and look our best.

i know what i normally eat, and if i was to eat less, i would definitely lose weight that i don't want to lose. if someone else ate like me, however, they might gain or lose weight. or just feel like crap. or be bored. or not think i have very good tastes in snacks. whatever.

it was eye-opening, to say the least. i realized even when i think that i've conquered a weak area, i can always be taken off guard! i'm not immune to insecurity, that's for sure.

so i decided to do my own "day of food" post.

this is not meant to encourage more comparison. please, don't look at me as the standard. i'm quite the opposite, actually.

it's meant to be a declaration of self-acceptance: i am rebekah. this is what i eat, and i'm totally ok with that.

let's get started, shall we?

5:05am - must. drink. water. now.

5:31am - oatmeal time! oatmeal time! oatmeal time!

in the mix: chocolate chia tahini oats. yum.

6:00am - decaf coffee (and assume i am pounding water the rest of the day from here out)

9:20am - post-run recover smoothie (recycled picture, i ate too quick!)

in the mix: hemp protein, hemp milk, banana, strawberries, blueberries, + spinach

p.s. - you can tell it's finally daylight! lol.

11:40am - leftover amaranth savory pancakes

mix it up! try substituting leftover cooked grains in your next pancake recipe. blend them up a bit in the food processor first if you like a smoother texture.

+ snow peas and copious amounts of (unpictured) carrots

intermission: i just had to show you guys this shelf on our freezer.

i love my little brother! he's 16... can you tell?

1:30pm - gala apple + almonds + rooibos tea

second intermission: look at my mom's cute plants!

2:06pm - second snack. because apparently the first one wasn't enough.

(on a book up for review - coming soon!)

4:07pm - dinner, part one.

mom's homemade whole wheat bread + homemade hummus

5:15pm - leftover baked potato + homemade 3-bean chili

... where are my leafy greens today???

taa-daa! y'all sleepin' yet?

who cares what everyone else does? you are really quite lovely just how you are.

i want you to look at your body and what you eat, and promise not to judge yourselves, either. deal?

-rebekah

makin' the chop: why i cut my hair.

2010-08-02T13:41:00.000-04:00

hey doodle-bugs! hope your weeks are kickin' off right.

i've been quite productive today, actually. got a great run in this morning, worked in the kitchen a bit, and sorted through my closet to see what i have to wear "back to school."

yes, i am five. where's my pocket protector, and which bus do i ride?

oh, and p.s. - last night, i had the ingenius revelation to make my fresh salsa in the food processor. it usually takes about 30 minutes chopping by hand, and last night it took... five. i'm kicking myself.

- - - WARNING: REALLY RIDICULOUS PICTURES AHEAD - - -

i thought i'd address something i get questions about all the time: my hair.

all through high school, i had super looooong, curly hair halfway down my back. it was my signature. it was larger than life, resided in it's own zip code, and possessed a distinct personality.

i was hyper-insecure about my body, but was convinced i could hide behind my hair. i felt safe wearing it as my mask: at least if i hated everything else about myself, my hair was bangin'. every compliment i ever got was about my curls.

so why did i cut it all off? good question.

why i chopped off my hair, and what i learned from it.

honestly? i cut my hair because i was ready for a change. a big one.

i had just broken up with my high school sweetheart, lived in a new town, started at a new college, and was making new friends. i wasn't the same girl as i was in high school, for better or worse, and i was ready to show it.

so the inches came off. at first, i was absolutely terrified. no longer could i hide my body (not that hair is an effective veil anyways)... what you saw was what you got. no BS.

for a while, i felt ugly, loathed it, regretted it, and then i realized - this is who i'm meant to be.

i'm not a diva, and i don't do high-maintanence. the long barbie hair was not my personality, not at all. and no offense to those with long, beautiful hair (gorgeous!), but honestly, every girl you see has long hair. they all look the same. shake it up a bit, ya know?

the surprise? cutting my hair was my "tipping point." i realized i had been pretending to be someone else for far too long. i dressed, spoke, and acted how i thought others expected me to, and couldn't ever just be myself! after that hair appointment, i decided i would never put myself through that again.

what started as a simple trim turned into what i so desperately need: a kick-start towards self-acceptance.

i've sinced realized many things about myself; some scary, and some thrilling. i'm not a girly girl. i don't like wearing a lot of make-up. i actually have pretty nice eyelashes. my body is just fine, without the curly veil. i'm not ugly. shockingly, i can run. i like tattoos, and can't wait to get more. i have muscles and curves. i'm constantly amazed by my body's changes.

and i'm proud of it. all of it. those things make me unique, and i wouldn't have uncovered any of them if i hadn't decided to just. be. me.

i love who i am, short hair and all. do you?

what "body security blanket" are you holding on to?

what's unique you love about yourself?

-rebekah

gluten-free thoughts, and recipes.

2010-08-01T10:09:00.002-04:00

hello friends! happy august :)

source.

i've been a bit preoccupied recently, mentally and physically, so my blog-thoughts have been limited. but you guys are wonderful, though, and really important to me!

as far as my chronic lack of comments, i'm going to attack my google reader today... seeing as how it crossed 1,000 unread posts day before yesterday (EEK!).

but more importantly, to the kitchen!

i'm always on the prowl for a good, hearty gluten-free recipe to bake for my little sister, but recently i've been trying to mix up my grains a bit, too. i think it's much healthier for our bodies to get a mix of grains, not only so we don't O.D. on wheat, but also to reap the nutritional benefits that each unique grain has to offer.

and if you're somebody like me who gets food boredom, mixing it up is crucial!

so all this lead to a freakin' amazing muffin recipe. naturally.

even if you aren't gluten-free, you should experiment with some of the amazing grains god has made! there are so many different ones, so why limit yourself to just wheat?

i took pictures, but for some reason, they won't load!

here's one of hers.

GF banana cinnamon raisin muffins
adapted from this saintly woman

combine wet:
- 1 c banana puree (2-3 big bananas)
- 3 eggs
- 2 tsp vanilla
- 2 tbsp maple agave, agave, or honey (thanks kelli!)
- 1/2 c canola oil
- 2/3 c brown sugar (1 1/3 c if you like really sweet things, 1/3 c if you want it barely sweet)

add in dry:
- 1 c buckwheat flour (so good with bananas!)
- 1 c sorghum flour
- 1/2 c tapioca starch
- 1 tsp baking soda
- 1 1/2 tsp baking powder
- 1 tsp salt
- 1 tsp xanthan gum
- 1 tbsp cinnamon
- 1 tsp nutmeg

stir in:
- 1 c raisins
optional: 1 c chopped walnuts or pecans

bake:
- at 375 for about 15 minutes.

tips:
- cool in pan on wire rack for 10 minutes, then remove from pan, and cool on rack until room temp.
- i wrap these individually in plastic wrap and throw them in a freezer bag.

what else do you need to make?

the easiest cracker recipe known to man... these were absolutely delicious! i'm still tinkering with the proportions, but here's my adaptation of the original.

quick "mary's" crackers:
from beautiful miss averie
- 1/3 c chia seeds
- 1/3 c sunflower seeds (i did half pumpkin, half sunflower)
- 1/3 c flax seeds
- pinch of salt

combine:
- pulse in food processor until you have coarse crumbs, not nut butter... although that's not a bad idea, really! i used pre-ground flax and added it after i mixed the first two.

add your flavorings:
- for sweet, try: agave, cinnamon, nutmeg, pumpkin pie spice, carob powder, etc.
- for savory, try: nutritional yeast, cumin, fresh herbs, sundried tomatoes, garlic and onion powder, cayenne pepper, black pepper, etc.

add water:
- i think averie suggestes 2-4 tablespoons, but i used much more... maybe 1/2 a cup or so?
- my suggestion?: start with 1/4 a cup, and increase as need be. it should be loose, not like cookie dough or peanut butter, but also not like soup.

bake:
- the recipe says bake 30 mins on each side at 300 degrees.
- my suggestion?: i baked mine longer, on a lower temp. i baked mine at 250 for about 40 minutes on each side, and they were still a bit soft. it's a learning process!

i think i might add even more water next time to make them a bit thinner, and more like mary's crack(ers). i love realllllly thin crackers, though. if you like them heartier like pita chips, by all means follow the recipe!

these are also way more nutritionally dense than your normal, flimsy cracker. real women (and men!) need real food, y'all!

gluten-free cooking tips:

source.

this week, i had the pleasure of catching up with christie from honoring health (one of the very best blogs out there!). she's been gluten-free for about a year, i believe, and just started tackling the intimidating job of baking bread for herself and her lovely husband. naturally, she came up against some difficulties!

the trouble with baking gluten-free is, not only are we not used to working with it, but that gluten is a tricky (but helpful!) little bugger.

wheat flour has two properies in baking: structure, and binding. when you bake GF, you have to get those properties from two separate elements. it's not difficult, but you have to know what to combine to get the texture you want.

i thought i'd give you guys a little run-down of my favorite gluten-free flours, and then tell you how to combine the different parts to make some truly bangin' bread.

flours:

millet: one of my favorites. physically similar to rice, but nutritionally similar to oats. mild.

teff, quinoa, and amaranth: high protein flours that work well in combination with other flours. have nutritional stats similar to cooked quinoa (obviously). strong tastes.

rice: one of the most popular GF flours. i only use brown rice flour because of the nutritients, but most frozen breads you buy use white rice flour. think of brown rice flour = whole wheat bread, and white rice flour = wonderbread. one of the most neutral tasting flours.

buckwheat: another of my favorites. ignore the name - it's not wheat! has a strong, nutty taste (similar to rye bread), and tons of nutrients (it's related to rhubarb!).

sorgum: a great neutral grain. good to combine with the stronger tasting flours.

chickpea/garbanzo: a new-to-me flour, i see this one a lot in ethnic recipes. has a great earthy taste, like hummus!

corn/tapioca/potato/arrowroot starches: sticky grains that act like glue in bread. most store-bought GF products will be based off of these, which is a shame because they aren't nutritionally solid by themselves. they are meant to be combined.

xanthan/guar gum: not flours, but what helps GF bread "set." if you've ever had a cake fall in or a bread recipe go flat, you know what i'm talking about!

there are other grains you can use, of course! these are just a few that are easy to find and i'm most comfortable with.

now what?

now you know what some GF flours are, but what do you do with them? most recipes are written with the protein/starch combinations in mind, but just so you know, the "science" behind it usually combines:

a protein (structure) + a starch (binding) + a gum.

my point? to teach you what you can and can't substitute. if you don't have all the flours called for in a recipe, that's ok!

good protein subsitutions: buckwheat, amaranth, quinoa, teff, chickpea, and sometimes brown rice. these are usually about 50% of the flour in the recipe. play around and see what flavor combo you like!

ok all-purpose flour substitutions: sometimes you can sub in a mix of 50% rice flour, 50% starch, and a tiny bit of xanthan gum if the recipe doesn't call for that much all-purpose. i wouldn't try this in a bread recipe, though.

good starch substitutions: arrowroot, potato starch, corn starch, tapioca starch. all starches are pretty much interchangable!

other tips:

- try to find gluten-free versions of your favorite recipes. instead of trying to substitute GF flours in a pound cake, for example, look for a GF pound cake recipe!

- check out the library and barnes & nobles for GF cookbooks. they help you learn so much!

- make a list of your favorite foods, and see what you'd miss going gluten-free. instead of shelling out $10 for GF crackers, try to make your own. who knows - you might like your version better!

- scour GF blogs for their "tip" sections. many GF bloggers have been baking for years and have lots of helpful pieces of knowledge to make your food taste better.

- practice, practice, practice. the more you bake GF, the more you know what to look for and expect, and the better your food will be!

- adjust your seasonsings. GF flours often taste strong or "off" to those of us used to wheat, so it helps to really flavor your recipes. swap in stock for water, double your herbs, increase your cinnamon, add dried fruit, etc.

honestly, re-learning how to eat and bake can be scary! it's a life change, but you can do it. take baby steps. it taste different, but sometimes different can open us up to a whole new world of flavors.

i learned most of what i know today from shauna, karina, and bette hagman - stay curious, ask questions, and respect your resources, y'all!

i hope this helps. i'm certainly no expert, but if you need help, shoot me an email or twitter me!

tips? thoughts? questions?

-rebekah

book reviews.

2010-07-30T16:19:00.000-04:00

hey all! tgif!

mom update: to all those that prayed and kept her in your thoughts, thank you! she is doing AMAZING. this morning she was up dancing, picking peppers in her garden, and generally trying to keep all of us in line :)

giveaway review.

as you heard yesterday, i won a foodie blogroll giveaway! wahoo!

i ended up with a $25 credit to iHerb, an awesome website where you can order hard-to-find products, like vegan vitamins and gluten-free products. score!

since my little sister is a celiac, i usually bake all her bread/muffins/granola bars myself. it's so much cheaper this way, and the giftcard was perfect to restock all our gluten-free flours!

thank you, Abby from iHerb!

book reviews.

being the nosy girl i am, i was pretty interested in some of the new books i have seen out on the internet.... you guys ever do that?

so, to the library!

my swag:

1. the end of overeating: taking control of the insatiable american appetite by david kessler

basically, this book gives you an inside look at how food manufacturers think. the author interviews many employees of food companies and popular restaurants, and asks them how they make the food as palatable and appealing as possible, and why we eat so much of it.

very enlightening about why we find fast food and restaurant food so enticing. it was really disturbing, honestly, to read about all the processing that goes into our meal that we have no idea they do! we think a piece of chicken is chicken, but it's not... at all.

if you eat out a lot or live off packaged foods, you must read this book. your food is not what it seems!

2. savor: mindful eating, mindful life by thich nhat hanh and lilian cheung

i'll be honest, i skimmed this book. it's a wonderful premise, but i just couldn't get through how repetitive it was! i'm easily bored, what can i say?

if you are new to the mind-body connection concept between food and emotions, this might be a good book for you. it's written by a doctor and a buddhist, so it's a very interesting combination of spiritual and factual. if that's up your alley, give it a try!

3. thrive: the vegan nutrition guide to optimal performance in sports and life by brendan brazier

i was totally blown away by this book. i want to marry brendan brazier! how is he single!?!?

on a more serious note, though, i picked up this book because wanted to see what the hype was about. one of my favorite bloggers, matt of no meat athlete, pretty much says this booked changed his life. naturally, my interest was piqued.

i loved this book because it broke down the science behind what happens when we eat. nothing bugs me more than when you read "eat this! it's good for you! it's healthy!" yeah yeah, that's nice, but WHY?

it's not good enough to tell me it's an antioxidant/superfood/omega-3. i need to know what the particular food does for me once i eat it. what does it do in my bloodstream? how will it effect my hair? my eyesight? my immune system? my skin? why should i spend money on it? why do i care?

thrive does this. it explains everything clearly, is very well-organized, and halelujah, i finally understand! it also has a guide for athletes/active people about, once and for all, what the most effective way to fuel before and after your workout is. you can sign up for a free 30-day newsletter to be emailed to you, if you're interested in learning the basics.

this is not a meat-slamming, veggie-promoting, PETA-thumping book. i loved it so much, i'm buying it! seriously - read this!

4. eating animals by jonathan safran foer

when it comes to your food, are you one of those people (like i totally was!) who says "oh, don't tell me! i don't wanna know!"

i hate to say this, but just because you don't ask about what's in your food doesn't change the fact - it's still there!

i would NEVER judge anyone for how they eat (vegan, juicing, carnivore, whatever!). that's totally personal, and totally up to you. but i will beg you, if you eat meat, PLEASE read this. please. you will be so glad you did!

5. last but not least: food rules by michael pollan

this book is as simple as it gets: 64 simple tips on how to eat as healthfully as possible.

i am a huge michael pollan fan, and this book is basically all his incrediblely sane thoughts, wrapped into an easy-to-read package.

if you've dieted all your life, are tired of the fast food lifestyle, or just need help simplifying how to eat naturally, this is a great place to start!

there it is... my thoughts on a few popular reads. i have a couple more coming (omnivore's dilemma, anyone?), so stay tuned!

have you read any good books recently?

have you read any of these?

anything i MUST read?

- rebekah

honey, i'm home!

2010-07-29T14:43:00.000-04:00

hello fabulous foodies and friends :)

as some of my twitter buddies know (@bekahraenels - i'd love to hear from you!), i've been at the hospital all day with my mom. she is now home, sleeping, and doing wonderfully. thank you all so much for your thoughts, kind words, and heartfelt prayers.

i swear she is already smiling - that woman is my hero! so proud of her.

in light of my soveryfreakin' early morning, i'm sorry to say i'm slackin' on my planned post. but you can expect my usual sarcastic self to be back at it tomorrow!

i'll be back with some book reviews and a post on some awesome swag i won from a contest!

love you all!
what have you been up to?
-r

self-reflection: second thoughts.

2010-07-27T09:59:00.000-04:00

hey hey amigos!

i was chatting away with my mom this morning, as usual, when she brought up yesterday's post. she totally understood how we can substitute "healthy" addictions in place of dealing with deeper issues, and it looks like you guys have experienced similar bumps in the road.

isn't it frustrating how we can do such a good job of mentally "blocking out" an issue? it's so easy to overlook something just because on the surface, it seems OK, "healthy," or other people are doing the same thing, but it can mean something totally different to us personally.

but what if there really isn't a deeper motive?

i thank my mom for pointing this out. i realized that in order to "dig deeper" yesterday, i failed to point out that sometimes, we just develop bad habits.

so like yesterday, let's say you chew a fair amount of gum. you like gum, and you eat too, so really don't feel like your using gum to cover true hunger. nonetheless, you seem drawn to chew gum... maybe a little more than you should.

why is this? you, my friend, just have developed what we call... a bad habit! it's super easy to do, with "healthy" things especially. little quirks like that tend to get lost in the daily grind, and 10 years can go by before we ever even notice it (can you imagine the cost for 10 years of gum!?!).

i'm not trying to continually knock gum, y'all. i'm just using it as an example of something we don't think about. there can be something different for each of us, or nothing at all. it's unique like we are.

my bad habit? for nearly every morning of all my teenage years, i would pour a huge bowl, and i would keep filling the bowl until all the milk was gone. that was my "serving size."

i would do the same thing everyday, regardless of how hungry i was. i just didn't even think about it. did i need all that? no way! it was just a mindless bad habit i picked up (my dad does it, too!), and it stuck with me for years before i ever gave it a second thought.

if i had simply judged how hungry i was before i poured that planet-sized bowl, i could have saved myself a lot of frustration! i used to do this with apples, too. there's nothing wrong with apples, but i used to just grab one whenever i was "feeling munchy." 4 or 5 apples a day is a lot of sugar, extra calories that didn't fill me up, and a lot of money!

the point is, whether you don't floss, mindlessly munch on fruit all day, or chew with your mouth open, a bad habit is something worth considering.

are "healthy" addictions bad?
thoughts?
-rebekah

a little self-reflection, yes?

2010-07-26T08:51:00.000-04:00

hello friends!
i hope your weekends were awesome in every way. i had an interesting weekend, to put it simply. learned a lot about myself, my thoughts, and what i want in life...

ever have one of those days where something just clicks? my weekend was full of those "aha!" moments.

noteworthy news:
the absolutely wonderful Medicinal Marzipan was kind enough to list me in her Body Loving Blogosphere weekly roundup. the other posts are incredible!

i also had the blessed opportunity to have lunch with Chuck Feerick, of Feerless Food. he was down in richmond for a triathalon (in the 100+ degree heat!!!) and was sweet enough to grab some food with me before his drive home at a cute little diner called Millie's.

while the atmosphere was fun, it was a little more crowded/noisy than i had anticipated. they were also out of almost half the items on the menu... not bueno for vegans :). all in all, we had great conversation, and he's a total doll. if you're interested in seeing exercise and food from a guy's perspective, hop on over to his awesome blog!

source.

today's thoughts: gum, and why we chew it.

i don't know about you guys, but up until very, very recently, i was a gum-chewing machine! yes, sugar-free gum and i spent many a day together, with all it's chemically, fake, poison-y goodness. i didn't go anywhere without a piece, and i could easily mowed through a whole pack in a weekend!

i kind of considered this my one vice... it wasn't a terrible habit, right? only when i started to notice it bothered my stomach did i ever even consider giving my up beloved gum.

since then, i've spent some time considering where this obsession came from. sure, it's not cocaine or anything, but an addiction is an addiction.

gum is one of those silly things we don't think about, but i am a firm believer that there is a reason behind everything we do. and i consider myself a strong person, so i didn't really like the control gum had over me. i seriously couldn't go a day without it!

so in a very christie-like manner, i just asked myself "why?"

i turned to gum for a few reasons:

1. emotion eating/food obsession: for the first time in my life, i wasn't eating constantly. i wouldn't just go grab something whenever i felt like it, but i still had the urge to. i hadn't dealt with all of my emotional reasons for needing food, so i still wanted to be chewing constantly.

why? because it was comforting! gum was a nearly calorie-free way to satisfy my food addiction... but satisfying that obsession wasn't the same thing as dealing with the problem.

i was addicted to food because i still thought eating, or the lack of it, would make me happy. my focus was in the wrong place - instead of pursuing things of worth (volunteering, friendships, God), i was too caught up in how "good" i could be (eating "healthy," getting skinny, being popular).

until i dealt with the emptiness inside, i was compelled to fill the space with food/chewing.

2. stress/loneliness: when i was really honest with myself, i chewed gum because i was worrying. i would get lost in my thoughts and fears about school, my major, my parents, losing weight, etc., and would turn to gum as a stress-reliever. once again - i wasn't dealing with the root problem. i was avoiding doing anything about my fears.

gum also distracted me from realizing i was lonely. i was working in the pool (isolated from the rest of the gym), going to community college with no friends, and dating a guy who worked long, random hours. the fibro was starting to limit what i could do, so i was getting out a lot less. the gum kept me "busy," so at least i didn't realize i wasn't really doing anything.

3. sugar: as you guys know, i'm hypoglycemic, so now i don't eat added sugars. when i was phasing-out sugar, naturally i craved sweetness, and sugar-free gum satisfied that need for me. i figured less sugar and no bingeing on desserts = success, when in reality, trading sugar for fake sugar = fail. don't get me wrong - i was moving in the right direction, just a bit misguided in my attempt.

source.

gum was my jam. it was my dirty little habit. it's taken a lot of practice and effort, but i can turn it down now and think about what my body really needs.

it's a scary thing to really get to the bottom of your actions, but it's worth looking into! there's no greater gift you can give yourself than understanding who you are.

will you do me (and yourself!) a favor?

please take a second and get real with yourself.

gum might not be your addiction, but make it personal: think about that food "you aren't safe around," or have no self-control with... i guarantee you it's not just because you really like the way it tastes. when we act compulsively and irrationally around a food, there is almost always a driving force behind it... be it emotions, memories, or guilt.

give yourself some time, keep thinking, and allow yourself the freedom to just be. you are absolutely worth the effort. treat yourself right, and get that monkey off your back!

need some help getting started?
- i really can't recommend christie's blog enough, if you're looking to ask the hard questions. not only is she a sweet friend, but she's pure magic.
- looking for honesty? she's a bit on-again-off-again, but sui is a gem and says things how they really are.
- if you struggle a bit more than you'd like to admit (i've so been there!!!), lara's blog is a straight-up resourse for those of us who are no-nonsense.
- most important? find someone you can confide in. a loving, supportive person in your life is the greatest strength i've found.

what food challenges you? pulls at your compulsive side?
what "food habit" do you allow yourself?
-rebekah

is your closet safe?

2010-07-24T07:48:00.000-04:00

take a look at these shorts. a long, hard look.

at first glance?

they look like... shorts... because they sorta are.

i got them from Target, land where dreams are made of. they were $9.99. champion brand.

but don't be deceived, my dear friends. these are evil shorts.

for those of you who have been here for the long haul, you know i've been on a roller coaster with my weight, and i'm finally at a place of (near) peace with the body i have today.

so why am i shaken up over cheap running shorts?

here's the deal - i bought these shorts after months of being bed-ridden from fibro. i got them on my first shopping outing "back in the real world. " while i was INCREDIBLY excited to need running shorts again, physically, there's really no other way to say this... but i looked sick.

i had no muscle, i barely could eat, and my hip bones jutted out (how feminine, right?).

so when i bought the infamous shorts, they fit fine... for my body that was BARELY hanging on to "health."

thank God i don't look sickly anymore. i've put my nose to the grindstone, exercised faithfully, eaten well, been patient, yada yada, all that good stuff.

and you know what? i've gained muscle back. i'm much, much healthier, body-wise. healthier than i was before the fibro, actually.

but now, the shorts don't fit. do i really want them to fit again? not at all!

the shorts aren't just shorts - they stand for a time in my life where my health was completely defeating me. i didn't get out of bed, except to pee. i ate one or two meals a day, because i was too tired to eat (i have NEVER felt that way before... EVER!). i slept more hours than i was awake. i was depressed and falling apart.

but the problem is... i always forget they don't fit. they aren't really too small, they just make me feel gross. they hit at a really unflattering place, so i am crazy self-conscious in them.

and i've had it.

i don't deserve to have to struggle with negative self-talk every time i'm getting ready to go do something GOOD for my body.

that's just messed up. i'm going to RUN, for goodness sakes! after my journey over the last year, the sheer fact that i can even WALK is incredible, and should be a celebration everytime i get dressed.

some days, i feel proud of my body, put on the dreaded shorts, and suddenly, i magically transform into a fat cow. because the shorts can do that, you know.

well, enough. i'm donating the shorts today. i'm done with them. all they bring is frustration in my life. and they were $9.99 - it's not like i'm throwing away some Prada.

but honestly, even if it was Prada, i deserve to feel strong, beautiful, and responsible every single day of my life.

do you have clothes in your closet that you avoid?

have you thrown out clothes that make you feel fat?

how do you deal with weight gain?

-rebekah

you up for a challenge?

2010-07-23T06:12:00.000-04:00

happy weekend, everybody!

no big post today... everyone sigh a collective sigh of relief :)

i'm getting my butt in the gym this morning to do some strength training today. thank goodness.

and then finally getting to see my old freshman year roommate (who's getting MARRIED in three weeks!), so i'll be out and about for this fine friday! how about y'all?

but i do have a challenge for you... you ready for it?

friday's focus: first impressions.

friday is usually the day of the week we try something different: new bars, new restaurants, new movies, etc.

with new experiences comes the opportunity to meet new people... and that can be either thrilling or intimidating, depending on your personality.

source.

unless you live under a rock, though, the situation will present itself.

the challenge?

pay close attention to how you feel about these new experiences.

be confident - even if you have to fake it.

be proud of who you are - don't apologize for your quirks, jokes, or appearance.

and most importantly, hold your head high - you are a treasure. you are unique. you are gorgeous, hilarious, and worth someone else's time. don't forget that!

these new aquaintances will discover it soon enough, i promise. now go get 'em :)

doing anything fun tonight?
are you confident around strangers? why?
do new experiences intimidate you? why?
-rebekah

blogger advice, and salsa.

2010-07-22T06:28:00.000-04:00

recently, i've been thinking a lot about the influence and responsibility we carry have as bloggers.

with the ability to share our thoughts with all of kingdom-come does comes with a price. if you write something, more than likely, someone will read it. and if someone reads it, you have just influenced them in some way.

source.

and yes, i know this is your personal space. for some of us, it's our diary. we pour out our most private thoughts, desires, and fears. it's our place to let it all go; to find our release. it's therapy.

... and that's awesome. that's what a diary is for! i would much rather you vent your angers and frustrations here than drown your sorrows in tequila later.

don't get me wrong, either: i believe in free speech. i would never pretend to tell you what you can and cannot do. your blog is your prerogative.

but i can't ignore the seemingly flippant attitude that keeps popping up in my google reader.

source.

if you would consider your blog your diary, you pretty much get a free pass here. pass go and collect $200. you share your thoughts with your friends, and you don't expect anything more from it but companionship and stress-release: a perfectly good use of social networking.

but if you believe your opinion commands respect, authority, and action, watch yourself.

what caused this bunch in my britches? well honestly, i've kinda wanted to smack one of my (previously) favorite bloggers. and it takes a lot for me to get ticked off.

i feel no need to name names, but basically, this blogger recently seems to feel they are an expert in all areas... politics, supplements, veganism, you name it. and that's all fine and dandy, except for the fact that much of the information they post "as fact" is completely inaccurate.

i'm certainly not trying to toot my own horn, or say i'm better than this person. they're hilarious, always make me think, and have introduced me to many new products. they also have probably 293874293874 times more readers than i do.

my problem is that this blogger hasn't researched the opinions they are passing on to their readers.

if this blogger prefaced their thoughts by saying something like "well, this is what's worked for me," or "in my opinion," i would get off their case. but far too often, i come across people who don't know what their talking about pushing their thoughts as facts that EVERYONE should follow.

sometimes, it's no big deal. but other times, it could really impact someone. for example: if you eat like crap, that's swell. i wish you wouldn't, but it's your life and your wallet, so you eat however you please.

but advising confused readers to exactly copy your habits, and then guaranteeing health and happiness, like i've seen a lot of recently? now i'm gettin' ticked. your choices are your own decisions, but misleading someone with inaccurate information is just downright shameful.

and my place in all this? here's the scoop: i'm 20 years old. i'm immature, haven't experienced all life has to offer, and don't pretend to know everything.

what i do on a daily basis works for me, but it certainly doesn't work for everyone. but what i post on my blog, i hold myself accountable to.

if i say something, you'd better believe i've put time and energy into it. i've researched it, thought about it, asked around, exhausted it, read about it, and just generally am incredibly passionate about it. not to say i'm never wrong, but if i am, it will be a GENUINE error on my part. and if i don't know the answer, i won't give you my thoughts until i do. period.

there's a difference between posting your feelings/thoughts on something, and telling other people to believe something as fact

if you blog with a purpose, whether it's product reviews, nutritional advice, animal rights awareness, etc., you are directly influencing others and the way they think. even if someone doesn't agree with you, what you say will subconsciously stick with them.

what should you ALWAYS do when you read personal media/opinions?

1. think for yourself! you have a brain, use it!

2. don't doubt your intuition. if it seems wrong, it probably is.

3. research, research, research! never take something at face value.

4. consider the source: are they an authority on the matter? have a degree in it? years of life experience? a reputable source?

5. stand up for yourself: don't be afraid to challenge them, or double check their sources.

please know this: i want my blog to be a safe, encouraging place. if i can help it BY ANY MEANS, i will not post something irresponsibly. and always feel free to ASK ME ABOUT IT! i just wanted to warn you guys.

ok, rant over. i hold nothing personal against this blogger, seriously. it was just a recent example that came to mind showing you guys how dangerous blogging can be, if you aren't careful. just because someone says something confidently doesn't mean you can check your sense of reason at the door.

ah yes, thank you big brother.

now, on something a little happier.

like mexican food.

fresh, summery salsa recipe

adapted from simply recipes, of course.

- 2-3 medium tomatoes, about 1 1/2 lbs (i used cherry tomatoes from mom's organic garden!), diced

- 1/2 huge red onion, diced

- 3 or 4 jalapenos, seeded and diced

- 2 or 3 big handfuls of fresh corn (unfortunately, i only had frozen)

- 1 lime, zested and juiced (very important!)

- 1 big bunch fresh cilantro, chopped fine

- 1 small bunch fresh oregano, chopped fine

- big pinch salt, little pinch pepper

directions: combine. let rest in the fridge a few hours to meld flavors.

that was difficult, i know... now, the pictures:

have you ever read someothing you knew was inaccurate on a blog?

what did you do?

what kinds of information do you post about?

-rebekah

um...

2010-07-21T18:47:00.000-04:00

so, i followed all of your expert advice and ***DRUMROLL PLEASE********

i have twitter.

@bekahraenels

expect stinkin' awesome tweets.

LEAVE YOUR TWITTER THINGY IF YOU HAVE A TWITTER THINGY!

that is all.

p.s.- for the love of chickpeas, will someone please give me some tips on how to drive this thing?
-rebekah