ask me anything, and a body image week ramble.

mornin' sunshines! today is a crazy-full day for me, so i am typing at warp speed right now... forgive my certain typos (i just wrote typeos - case in point).

sidenote: apparently the last few days i've been struggling with google images to get good pictures for the blog, so certainly unrelated, but kinda funny/true/thought-provoking at the same time:

source.

two quick thoughts for today:

1. thank you, thank you, thank you to all the amazing voices who chimed in on my little animal-free series over the last week or so, but also, thanks to all who read! you guys are seriously my joy in writing.

but seriously, though - this isn't a one-sided blog. i want to be a research buddy, a source of encouragement, and someone to bounce thoughts off of... no matter what you eat!

i really appreciate the folks who commented something different than i wrote, or added something i missed. my dear friend christie's comment on yesterday's vegan misconceptions post reminded me that i still i want to write much more about approaching nutrition in general, not just animal-products, so stay tuned for that (and a post on iron absorption!). if you have anything you're curious about or want to hear my thoughts on, please comment or shoot me an email! there seriously is no such thing as a stupid or pointless question.

2. september 5-12th is national body image and eating disorders awareness week (BIEDAW) in australia. to all my australian friends (and everyone else!), i hope you realize how incredibly beautiful your life is! i seriously couldn't be more in awe of how incredible the human body is - in every size, race, and gender. amazing.

because of this, i've been thinking about body image a lot. this is a bit of a ramble, but here's some of my uncensored thoughts:

i guess i've felt that god has mostly healed me from my negative thoughts in the last few months, so i haven't posted a lot on body image. i should change that, now that i think about it... but anyways, in celebration of body image and ed week, i want to update y'all on this new phase in my story: the victory we can find in knowing numbers AND not caring.

i've written about my body image struggles before, so i am sensitive about posting weight/calories/pant size/etc. you aren't me, are you? so why would my weight effect your health? it's too easy to judge and get fixated on details that aren't important in life and can lead to destruction.

if you follow me on twitter, you might have caught a glimpse of my excitement yesterday:

@bekahraenels:
To all the girls who think you have to starve to stay in shape, DON'T! i prob ate 3,000+ cals and my pants STILL FIT! You are beautiful TODAY

about 13 hours ago via txt
my point? when you embrace nourishing your body for health, what that looks like to others might seem strange.
 
do i eat like a man? yes. am i the strongest i've ever been in my life? yes! how? I EAT GOOD FOOD WHEN I'M HUNGRY. i don't get emotional if my "i-haven't-broken-the-calorie-counting-habit-completely-yet" brain says WOAH YOU JUST ATE 1,000 CALORIES IN ONE SITTING. because you know what? i needed them! and i feel great after eating them! 
 
it's an incredible moment when you can acknowledge reality about life, how it applies to you, and accept it peacefully. i've been testing that in my diet over the last few weeks, and it was a huge victory to discover how many calories i was eating and SMILE because i didn't care. i've just accepted my new, healthier, active, incredibly strong body needs a lot of food. want a number? between 2,500 and 3,500 calories.
 
i wasted years jumping through all the "right" hoops to manage my weight: i never ate fried foods. i denied myself incredible desserts at parties. i counted calories. i didn't eat at night. i exercised up to 2 hours a day, 6 times a week. i ate my fruits and veggies. i read nutrition labels like it was my MCAT.
 
none of that was effective at anything other than making me miserable. in my heart, i never felt adequate. sadly, it took an uncurable disease before i realized i can be happy with life the way it is RIGHT NOW because that's all i have.
 
i'm not scared to post those calories because my life proves starvation is NOT the only way! please reexamine that logic... your body deserves so much more! also, i love throwing people for a loop, and it totally tickles me to death that it's not kosher to like your body and be a girl... but you know what? I LOVE THIS BODY.
 
you heard right folks. shockingly, my body is ok today, and it was ok yesterday, and it will be tomorrow too. and yeah, it's still ok if i eat cake.
 
GASP. i said it. sue me.
 
god's been teaching me that peace with myself spills over in other areas of my life, too. i go to bed at 9-something pm every night, didn't party on my 21st birthday and don't drink, don't like dessert, and my mom is my best friend. i love moving my body and am thrilled with how god's given me the strength after weeks of being confined to my bed. and the most increible gift? after years of trying to find my worth in getting guys' attention, i'm perfectly content being single and living life one day at a time.
 
so yeah, here i am world. i'm 21, right-handed, can fit in kids' clothes, have bloodshot eyes and a smart mouth, and a fiery temper that blows up in ethics class. but that's neither here nor there. what's imporant is i could have written anything and been equally satisfied. woah nelly, and praise god. 
 
life is miraculous: don't miss living because of details.
 
if you're australian, how will you participate?
if you aren't, what do you embrace about your body?
-rebekah